“You say a Texan is from the East. I DARE you.”

That dare comes from my wife, who has this annoying habit of finding the one piddling inconsistency in what is otherwise a veritable symphony of my plausible nonsense.  In this case, we were discussing weather patterns across the United States (and how it relates to jumping a dead car battery).  So.  Fine.  Texas is part of the East.  It’s on the Gulf of Mexico; that’s part of the Atlantic Ocean.  Hence, Texans are Easterners.

Texans may now declare kanly upon my House and hunt me down at their leisure.  I accept my fate; but what could I do?  She dared me.


  • janetney says:

    you, sir, are incorrect (WRONG!!)in saying that Texans are from the east…we, sir, are the true southerners of this nation…just look at any reputable map…we, sir, are the true patriots of these United States…just read any reputable history book…your awesome wife is correct…just sayin’…

    janet ney

  • Moe_Lane says:


    My wife (smugly): “I rest my case.”

  • Just Dave says:

    I knew a guy once who said the East was anything the other side [i.e. east] of Denver.

  • Phil Smith says:

    So far, none of you have it right.

    Texans are not from the east, the west, or the south.

    We’re Texans. Full stop.

  • Graham G. Storey says:

    Not only is Texas in the east, it is a fairly small state.

    Alaska, on the other hand, is further west than Hawaii. It can take Texas by one hand and give her a shake with no effort.


  • matt says:

    I’ve always thought the the dividing line between the East and West was the Mississippi river. But the Census Bureau say its part of the West South Central states. By either measure, it isn’t part of the East

  • Texas Pete says:

    Sometimes, when we’re feeling expansive and inclusive, we Texans may refer to dinky little parts of the country such as California as “Far West Texas”, or New York as “Far Northeast Texas”, or Alaska as “Far Northwest Texas”. We do this mainly to buck up people who have the misfortune of not being Texans.

  • […] PDRTJS_settings_102454_post_1569 = { "id" : "102454", "unique_id" : "wp-post-1569", "title" : "It%27s+All+About+Perspective…", "item_id" : "_post_1569", "permalink" : "http%3A%2F%2Fliberexmachina.wordpress.com%2F2010%2F01%2F05%2Fits-all-about-perspective%2F" } So, Moe Lane was dared by his wife to declare Texas as part of “the East“. […]

  • Skip says:

    However, you are very slightly correct, Moe. Residents of Fort Worth will tell you that Dallas is in the East, because Fort Worth is “where the West begins”. Those of us living in Dallas just feel sorry for the poor, deluded Fort Worthians…

    But we definitely agree that anything north of the Red River is Yankee country…

  • john says:

    I agree with Phil’s comment as far as pure-bred Texans, “We’re Texans. Full stop.”

    Having also lived in Anchorage I love the “Far Northwest Texas” reference.

    A dead car battery though is just a dead car battery; would you like gloves with those jumper cables?

  • Joshua says:

    Don’t tell me that Mexico is part of the Southeast, I will lose my mind.

    -A Texan

  • Tony G says:

    So I’m using liberexmachina’s blog for my Web site because I don’t have one, and I’m a frequent reader (roommate emeritus) of his. That being said, this is the first time I’ve commented on one of his links’ posts (except for the time I chastised Chuck Norris… it was worth the risk…)

    To Skip: Dallas is in fact part of the East, however, parts of Texas east of Dallas are not. How does this work? Simple, all those Yankee artsy fartsy folks from the East immigrated to Texas and started the settlement of Dallas, known for it’s rich European culture and ties to New York. Therefore, I submit that Dallas is an Eastern city (an embassy, if you will) in the midst of North Texas (kind of like how West Berlin was in East Germany). I hope this clarifies to you unfortunate non-Texans on how our geography works. For more information on Texas geography, please read Steven’s (liberexmachina’s) blog. Oh yeah, and tell him to get a Facebook.

  • Skip says:

    …Ties to New York!

    Bite your tongue. Them’s fighting words.

  • Tony G says:

    “Skip says:
    January 7, 2010 at 10:30 am

    …Ties to New York!

    Bite your tongue. Them’s fighting words.”

    “Fighting words?” Don’t you mean “fightin’ words?”
    Point for Fort Worth!

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