Moe Lane

Ted is the former Solicitor General of Texas and should be familiar to long-term readers of RedState: he was one of our featured speakers at the first RedState Gathering in Atlanta.  These days he’s one of the candidates running to replace retiring Senator Kay Hutchison.  We spoke about the campaign yesterday:

Obviously, given Ted’s background the conversation included his reaction to Obamacare’s recent drubbing in the courts.  His Senate campaign site is here.

Moe Lane (crosspost)

The one that only he can see, apparently.

At first I thought that the outrageous thing that Bill Nelson had said in this interview with Rick Klein of ABC News was that the Senator wasn’t sure whether or not Obamacare was unconstitutional (good safety tip for legislators: if you don’t know whether or not a law violates the Constitution, don’t vote for it).  But what Nelson was actually saying was that he considers Obamacare Constitutional, but that the courts might disagree.  That’s fine.  He’s wrong for thinking that it’s Constitutional, but it is consistent with his vote.

But then Senator Nelson said this:

“But there is at the end of it what is called a severability clause, that says if parts are stuck down, that doesn’t strike down the whole law.”

Wait.  What?

How do I put this: NO, THERE IS NO SEVERABILITY CLAUSE AT THE END.  There was one in the first draft; it was later removed; the version that you voted for, Senator Nelson, had no severability clause; and the government used as part of its argument for keeping the individual mandate that the mandate could not be separated out from the rest of Obamacare.  All of which is immediately obvious to anybody who took the time to read  Judge Vinson’s decision in the first place… which apparently does not include Senator Bill Nelson.

Although, to be fair: Bill Nelson obviously didn’t read the original bill, either.  In that, at least, this indicates a certain consistency.

Moe Lane

Mostly because it’s a psychology-based game that requires you to suppress a set of mental reflexes that the Internet normally goes out of its way to encourage. Play the game a few times and you’ll see what I mean.

Via Waxy.

OK, here’s the situation…

…My parents went away on a week’s vacation!
And they left the keys to the brand-new Porsche;
Would they mind?
Ummmm, welllllll, of course not!
I’ll just take it out for a little spin
(And maybe show it off to a couple of friends!)
I’ll just cruise it around the neighborhood
Well maybe I shouldn’t
Yes, of course I should.

Parents Just Don’t Understand

Err… right.  Where was I? (more…)

I’m not really checked out on this fight between Redskins owner Dan Snyder and Washington City Paper.  But I do know that it’s producing epic-level snark elsewhere:

I just want you to know you have my full support in this matter, as I support everything you have done during your stewardship of the Redskins. You rock. I wish you good health and long life and hope you run the franchise for many, many years to come. I say this with utmost sincerity as a lifelong fan of the New York Giants.

It gets better from there, so read the whole thing.

Normally, there would be a temptation to get into the guts of this Big Government video showing Lefty and Democratic protesters at an anti-Koch brothers rally. For those who aren’t aware, the Koch brothers are the latest Two-Minute Hate object of choice among the netroots, who hate them for… giving money to conservative causes, apparently. Actually, I’m being kind: the netroots hate because the alternative involves too much self-reflection to be really comfortable.

Anyway, there would normally be a temptation to crack this video and extract the meat of the Left-wing Crazy inside, only: it’s all Crazy inside. These people were cheerfully advocating murder to anybody who asked them, in complete disregard of the fact that they were being filmed:

I know, I know: there is something kind of disturbing about seeing people relaxed enough to express sick and twisted rhetoric like this without fear of consequences – and it’s definitely infuriating that you and I have to watch and filter every word we say or write, or at least be aware that if those words can be twisted, they will be. But look on the bright side: if this crowd is any indication, being able to spout their racist filth freely has the side effect of gradually lowering their IQs to room-temperature levels. Given that the Left generally likes to sneer at the Right’s collective intelligence, well… karma: it’s what’s for dinner.

Still, I want to show you the worst person in this video. And let me tell you, she had some competition.

(more…)

Well, this was a day in applied cheerful viciousness, wasn’t it?  The accumulated snow days must be taking their toll.

Time for a little soothing Bach.

Bach – Brandenburg Concertos / Freiburg Baroque Orchestra

This is frankly a guess, but if you’re a first-term Senator from a state that is kind of tired of the shenanigans that your party has been up to lately, and if you have raised only $12K in the last quarter, you are doubly in trouble.  And if you’re still going around in 2011 telling people that you haven’t made a decision yet whether you’ll be running in 2012: hey, guess what?  You’ve probably made a decision and just don’t want to admit it.

Anyway, a real shame about that Webb fellow.  Switched parties, broke bread with the people who spit on his troops when they came back from Vietnam, and had to vote against every conservative principle he might have had… and for what?  The title of ‘Senator’ and the chance to spite George W Bush.  Which – hold on, let me use my Kindle search function…

…yup, as I suspected: said spiting was something Webb completely failed to do.

Tragic.  Simply tragic.

Moe Lane

This item is designed for near-future campaigns only, of course.  Games set firmly in the modern era are strictly out of luck.

Skin gun.  This device heals 1d6 burn damage on a successful DEX check by the medic; reverses any CHA loss from original burns.  A successful application of the Skin Gun gives +4 to saving throws vs. infection. Time per application: 1d4 x 45 minutes.

Yeah, I know: this would come in handy in the real wor…

- Hold on, I’m getting a frantic hand signal from my producer.  Yeah, Frank?

(off-screen unintelligible speech)

What do you MEAN, “It’s real?”

(off-screen unintelligible speech)

REALLY real?  It’s not just Hot Air?

(off-screen unintelligible speech)

Of course we should cut to video (under the fold: it’s not for the squeamish)! (more…)

This photo could very easily be labeled as “Mayor Mike Bloomberg*about to do to a groundhog what he’s been doing lately to NYC.”

Sweet God.  It’s getting so bad for The City that I’ve been asking myself lately, Would the Working Families’ Party freakazoid really have been that awful? – I mean, seriously: banning smoking in the freaking public parks?  This overwhelms my ability to snark about it.

Moe Lane

*WHO QUIT THE REPUBLICAN PARTY IN 2008.  NOT OUR GUY.  NOT OUR PROBLEM.  PLEASE DO NOT GIVE US HIS MAIL.

Except to note that the site linked to here is apparently 12 years old.  Understand it, and you understand the Internet.

Via here.

Hot Air, on the inadvisability of the executive branch treating House Oversight Chair Darrell Issa the same way that it treated House Oversight Ranking Member Darrell Issa:

If they continue to stonewall Issa, they could set some of their staff up for contempt of Congress charges…

FROG MARCH!
FROG MARCH!
FROG MARCH!

(pause)

Ahem.