#rsrh Post-surgery recovery: kind words, clear fluids, and drinking my enemies’ pain.

[UPDATE]: Welcome, Instapundit readers.

I must confess something to all of you.

The expressions of warmth and support from my readers (and my colleagues at RedState, and my friends generally) were a great comfort to me this afternoon.  Having your gallbladder removed is often an outpatient procedure, which essentially means that you can be sent home to feel bloated, nauseous, and generally miserable in the privacy of your own bed instead of at the hospital; which is actually not a bad thing.  Particularly when you have access to the warm regards (and bad jokes*) of people who care enough to offer some comfort.  Can’t put enough emphasis on that: stuff like that is meaningful on a personal level.

However, what tells me that I’m doing my job is the hate mail – and, bless his heart, somebody stepped up to the plate today:

That’s right: there’s somebody out there who is actually upset that I came through my surgery today alive, aware, and sane.  I don’t know about the rest of you, but Jeffrey here of the Los Angeles branch of California State University has given me one Hell of a testimonial, thanks to his desire to see my wife made a widow and my children orphans. I’ll remember this the next time that I wonder – as all bloggers and writers do, honestly – whether I’m making a difference.  Clearly, I am – because they hate me.  They really, really hate me.  This is such a pick-me-up I almost don’t need the next pain pill.

The funny part?  I don’t hate them.  Because hate makes you stupid.

Moe Lane

PS: Am I also going to milk this for all that it’s worth?

Why, yes.  Yes, I will.  Solely to tick some of these people off.

PPS: I think that we’re done hearing about my gallbladder, though. No apologies for dwelling on it today, but there’s stuff to do. Like, say, taking away NY-09 from the Democrats. Which we might just, at that.

*Bad jokes are good.  Good jokes make me laugh too hard, which will hurt for a couple of days.


  • NotSoBlueStater says:

    Be well, brother. As for the pathetic on the left, ignore them. This is how they play.

  • Rob Crawford says:

    Mercury poisoning? Aren’t you avoiding compact fluorescents?

    • Moe_Lane says:

      Rob: I am now. I’m still trying to figure why mercury poisoning, for that matter: it’s kind of… disconnected.

      NSBS: Ayup, this is how they play. And this is how I play: by mocking their pain. 🙂

  • Demosthenes says:

    On the bright side, you could become the very first person in history whose COD on the certificate read “Poisoned by planet.” Now THAT would be an awesome way to go.

    • Moe_Lane says:

      Or, alternatively, if Freddie had faked his death and came back as a super villain specializing in Strange Deaths, and I was the first person to stumble upon this, and… no, this breaks down: I like too many Queen songs.

  • Jeff says:

    It’s really the .edu account that makes it funny. On an unrelated note, I was hoping for at least one completely nonsensical post as you were coming out of anesthesia.

  • Jack Savage says:

    A joke for you.

    A guy walks into a bar, and a robot bartender comes up and asks,”What’ll you have?” The guy says, “Martini.” The robot asks, “What’s your IQ?” The guy says, “150”. The robot starts talking about physics, philosophy and insider Freddie Mercury jokes.

    Intrigued, the guy goes back the next week. The same scenario takes place, but when the robot asks his IQ, the guy says, “100”. The robot launches into discussions about football, NASCAR, and whether Lindsay Lohan’s boobs are real.

    The next week the guy goes in, same sequence of events, but this time when the IQ question comes up he says, “50”.

    The robot leans in and whispers, “Are you guys sorry you voted for Obama yet?”

    Get well soon, don’t break any thermometers and suck down the contents.

  • Catseye says:

    Glad to hear your up and about Moe. Be well!

  • unclebryan says:

    Get well soon! The pedant in me requires me to say this, however. I’m sure that you meant to say “…nauseated…” and not “… nauseous…”. The former means “sick”. The latter means “sickening”. Carry on.

    • Moe_Lane says:

      unclebryan: Clearly, the drugs were at fault.
      Cynthia: I am not going to let this keep me from the bacon. Just gotta be smart about it, that’s all.
      Jeff: they get a little antsy about expensive electronics. Besides, don’t I do nonsensical posts now?
      Bill:glad you like the site.
      Everybody making jokes or bad puns: heh.

  • Bill Chunko says:

    Mr Lane,

    I don’t read your blog often, but I read it often enough to know that I like what you are doing. I wish you a speedy recovery.

    Bill Chunko

  • Just Dave says:

    I like too many Queen songs


    I guess then, this weekend you’ll be Lazing on a Sunday Afternoon?

  • I hope you heal promptly. I have to confess my first thought upon reading of the impending loss of your gallbladder was a pang that there would be few-to-no future posts about bacon.

  • John Davies says:

    I had mine out a few years ago, and the surgeon said that the body adapts to the loss of a gall bladder and he feels that the adaptation is better than the original design.

    Worst part was waiting to be healed enough to go back to swing dancing.

    I waited a few months to have a Five Guys burger and had no problem digesting it. I didn’t have trouble before either. So I don’t really miss mine.

  • Godspeed, Moe — the gall of your bladder to do that to you!

  • DaveP. says:

    A friend of mine had to have emergency bypass surgery and I’ve been on her ever since to get a zipper pull-tab tattooed onto the top of her scar…

    Rest well knowing that all the right people hate you, brither.

  • J.M. Heinrichs says:

    He may be trying to dissuade you from joining the hat-guy brigade.


  • […] From Jack Savage, a commenter on a recent Moe Lane post: […]

  • Cold Warrior says:

    Wow! Thanking God for your good health (minus the gall bladder) and will keep you and yours in my prayers. Thanks for sharing your experience — good to know gall bladder surgery can be done on an out patient basis! My neighbor across the street had a stent put in his heart on an outpatient basis, and he watched them do it! Mindboggling how great our medical technology is. Rest, rest, rest so you will come back strong!

  • Right Wing Nutter says:

    One of my many mottoes is that you are known by the enemies you keep. If I knew nothing else about you that comment would place you among the good guys.

  • RT says:

    I had problems with my gallbladder once and used organic apple cider vinegar, which helps the digestion and softens the stones, and epsom salts, which flushes the bile and the intestines. Wondering if anyone ever suggested that approach and whether you had time to try it? It is a natural solution, but I doubt it would work in all cases.

    Anyway, I enjoy your writings and point of view and hope you make a full recovery. Best.

    PASS THE BILL. Would you buy a used car from that guy, Barack?

  • TMLutas says:

    Get well soon and don’t overdo things. Doing more posts is not overdoing things. B-)

  • Dan Maloney says:

    Best wishes for a speedy recovery.
    Take your time checking out of the hospital until you are completely back into fightimg trim.
    Good luck!

  • Allan Ripley says:

    Good healing, man. But please, please: don’t pull a Lyndon Johnson on us. Some things are just better left imagined.


  • Chris Nordby says:

    Dear Moe,

    Hoping you have a speedy, uninteresting recovery and that the lack of a gall bladder in no way diminishes your most awesome flavor of gall. Galling, I know.

    Glad you get to appreciate your impact–not everyone gets the satisfaction of hearing their enemy’s lament before heading off into the sunset.

    Say hi to Larry, Shep, and Curly too.


  • zaphod77 says:

    Get well soon.

    Yeah, it’s a good thing you’re getting under their skin but wouldn’t it be awful to be that person?

  • Peg C. says:

    Feel great again soon, Moe! It could be worse – you could be a zombie 😉

  • NU Wildcat says:

    Moe…speedy recovery, my friend!

  • BigGator5 says:

    I’m happy you are feeling better Moe. Take a couple of days off, the world will be here when you get back (what shape it will be in, I can’t make any promises there).

  • Smaack says:

    Why do you blank out his name? He volunteered it as he wished you death. I don’t think he deserves that kind of protection or respect.

    • Moe_Lane says:

      Smaack: Because (unlike, say, RedState) I don’t make people register and confirm a valid email address before they can post. I am confident enough that the idiot used his real email to screenshot the comment, but just in case somebody was trying identity theft…

  • Semper Why says:

    Yay! He’s back and bladder than ever! 🙂

  • D.J. says:

    All right, here are some bad jokes:
    Did you hear about the vampire turned poet?
    He went from bat…to verse.
    What do you get if you cross an elephant and a grape?
    Elephant grape sin(theta).
    What do you get if you cross a mosquito and a mountain climber?
    Nothing. You can’t cross a vector and a scalar.

    There…hope they gave you some groans and not too much laughter.

  • Jeff Weimer says:

    Best wishes on a speedy recovery, Moe. Keep up the good work, and keep the hate mail coming. It’s always good to see the raw id of the opposition on display.

  • PakviRoti says:

    Hmm. I’m surprised no one has said it.

    Let them hate, so long as they fear. Wise words, we need to reintroduce the Left to fear.

  • Darin H says:

    Speedy recovery Moe, just be glad that you aren’t subject to Obamacare… They might have just put you down for something so routine.

  • Eric says:

    Hey Moe, had my gall bladder out years ago and don’t miss it a bit. Still can eat all the same stuff, good and bad, without problem, so there’s hope. Mmmmm, bacon. And pepperonis.

    Best wishes.

  • RT says:

    Hey D.J. I like the cross jokes. It reminded me of this favorite from a ranger at Great Sand Dunes NP:

    (Holding out two closed fists)

    If I have a pinon nut in this (left) hand, and two pinon nuts in this (right) hand, what have I got?

    A difference of a pinon!

  • Canthros says:

    I’m glad to see you’re holding up, Moe. Get well, soon.

  • Warren Bonesteel says:

    Years ago, I played at being a martial artist. I often won in the ring, but a couple of those wins came at the cost of a few broken ribs. A good friend of mine thought it amusing to visit me after those matches and offer his condolences…while telling both good and bad jokes.

    Yes. I laughed, but I cursed him, as well. It was all quite amusing from his pov. iow, Moe, I understand and fully appreciate your pain.

    (However great the temptation, avoid all of the spicy foods for a few weeks, Moe. The docs got that one right.)

  • mriggio says:

    Rest up & enjoy a speedy recovery Moe. As to the dietary restrictions, they’re overblown. Shed my GB 40+ years ago, have been eating everything not nailed down for the last 39.5, give or take. Cheers!

  • […] Moe Lane. And this is also my response when some moron accuses me of “hate.” I don’t know […]

  • RebeccaH says:

    Glad you’re better. Mriggio is right about the diet, within reason. I also had my gallbladder removed in 1969, and have had no problems because of it.

    Ignore the haters. Mostly, they’re personality disordered, either of the perpetually enraged or the basement-dwelling type. You bloggers do make a difference, so for the love of Mike, don’t stop.

  • Pamela says:


    Gallstones are so much fun. NOT!

    Had mine out a few years ago. I did find that meal sizes which had not been an issue previously, suddenly were.
    So small meals make life much more pleasant.

    Also discovered that the rule of “You must avoid certain foods yada-yada” is bull. You can eat anything you choose to put in your mouth.

    Your body on the other hand will let you know in no uncertain terms when it does not like what you so enjoyed dining upon. Small additions of pineapple with a meal can aide in digestion by the way. Rest, no lifting if possible and in a few weeks you will be recovered.

    All the best.

  • Eric Scheie says:

    Nice to see that you’re in such good spirits! Get well soon.

  • Fausta says:

    Get well soon, Moe!

  • Maureen says:

    Get well soon. Hope they’re giving you plenty of painkillers!

    I recommend extremely undemanding, comfortable, calm radio shows or audiobooks. That way you can “read” with your eyes closed, resting.

  • Dandapani says:

    You don’t judge a man by his friends; you judge a man by his enemies! Keep up the good work! Godspeed!

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