Dec
31
2012
--

“The Holly & The Ivy.”

I was going to say something rude to 2012 on its way out the door, but you know: that year ain’t worth it.

The Holly & The Ivy, Mediaeval Baebes

Dec
31
2012
1

I don’t QUITE have the nerve to quote Simon Pegg directly here…

…but good GOD but I can see his point.  Without visualizing it, in any way, shape, or form.

Via Fark Geek.

Moe Lane

PS: You realize, of course, that Simon Pegg is officially Living The Nerd Dream.  And God love him for it.

Dec
31
2012
8

My 2013 predictions.

Fair warning: I’m awful at these.  So there’s that.

  1. John Boehner will remain Speaker of the House.
  2. Nancy Pelosi will announce her retirement after this term.
  3. The economy will go back into recession.
  4. Our national credit rating will be downrated.
  5. A lot of politicians, on both sides, are going to be shocked to discover that the country will be quite happy to blame a lot of politicians, on both sides, for the previous two things.
  6. There will be interminable calls for a third party, which will not materialize.
  7. Then again, neither will the various reforms, proposed rules changes, new operating methodologies, and whatnot.
  8. The Senate will still not pass a budget.
  9. President Obama will discover that blaming everybody but him for everything is boring, and that everything is boring, and he’ll be displaying that boredom more and more.
  10. On the bright side: Pacific Rim is going to be insanely good.

Dec
31
2012
22

Ah, mimosas. How you comfort me.

‘Course, I’m mixing the champagne with Minute Maid’s specially-formatted OJ for kids, because, well, I’m a parent and that’s how it works.  Still, it lets my wife have a dry champagne for once.

What’s your anesthesia of choice for this evening?

 

Dec
31
2012
4

(Alleged) Occupy Wall Street activist arrested in ANOTHER (alleged) bomb plot.

Please note: “another.”

To the best of my knowledge, accused bombmaker Aaron Greene is not linked in any formal way to last year’s plot by Occupy Wall Street activists to bomb a Columbus, Ohio bridge.  Then again, it’s not entirely clear what Greene was (allegedly) planning to bomb: when the cops arrested him and his bourgeois moll Morgan Gliedman they had just gotten to the stage of putting an actual bomb-making shop together*.  A charming little substance called HMTD was found on-scene**; for those without access to Wikipedia, it’s the triggering explosive of choice for suicide and car bombers worldwide.  And, naturally, Greene and Gliedman are both children of privilege.  One would wonder if Mummy and Daddy hugged them enough… but then, most people who don’t get hugged enough still somehow manage to avoid making bombs in response, so perhaps the answer isn’t really all that interesting after all.

Not much else to note, except for this rather unfortunately surnamed lawyer’s quote from the Huffington Post:

“The whole situation’s sad,” said attorney Lisa Pelosi, who represented Greene. She declined further comment.

(more…)

Dec
31
2012
2

A public service announcement for my lurkers and personal trackers.

No, I’m not going to pretend that I don’t have ’em: I write for a major conservative weblog and I am a gleefully-annoying, startlingly-relevant, revolving son-of-a-bitch on wheels on my own hook.  False modesty is nice, but counter-productive in this case.

Anyway… those lurkers/trackers have a problem.  It’s the day before the New Year, and this year’s Amazon take is noticeably below par for the Christmas season.  While this may not be exactly surprising, given that retail sales this Christmas sucked, that will not really help the Left when I start writing needle-vicious posts about how genuinely awful Barack Obama is at generating retail sales* – to say nothing of the rest of the Democratic party, of course.  It’ll be fun… but, alas for me: if it turns out that I generated more referral fees this December after all then there’s not that all-important personal anecdotal evidence that the best pundits use to justify their partisan wrangling.

So.  Here you go, ye lurkers and personal trackers: Amazon.com.  The Cause DEMANDS that you let loose your inner faux-Keynes and spend some of your personal cash in a fashion that profits me.  If you don’t, then whatever happens next is your fault and your responsibility.  Sp start that spending!  – And, remember, this is what happens when you self-objectify yourself; you end up getting used by people with actual self-respect.  Weird how that works out, huh?

Moe Lane

PS: No, I have no intention of telling you what your target number is.  Best to spend as much as possible, yesno?

*Or, indeed, at anything besides getting Barack Obama re-elected dirty.

Dec
31
2012
1

T-Minus 20 hours on the fiscal cliff…

…and counting.

This is, by the way, a completely artificial countdown.  Congress should either just serve up the sh*t sandwich, or else admit that the Senate couldn’t even put that together.  Either way, there’s no need to delay this any further.

Dec
30
2012
4

Compromise reached on… farm bill.

Moo, I say. Moo.

If you were asking yourself Just how much of a kabuki theater is what’s going on in Congress right now? – well, wonder no more. From USA Today:

Top leaders on both the Senate and House Agriculture committees announced a deal on Sunday to extend the 2008 farm bill by a year, a deal that could avoid a surge in market prices for milk and other commodities.

The measure, which still has to be approved by votes in both chambers of Congress, would give lawmakers another year to iron out a deal. The 2008 farm bill expired on Sept. 30, but a failure to have a law in place would have its biggest impact on the agricultural sector next year beginning with milk.

(more…)

Dec
30
2012
12

OK, I’m back: what’s the news on the fiscal cliff?

ahh.  The gasoline has been poured over the piles of old newspaper, plywood, and tar-soaked straw; the piles of flour have been fully dispersed into the air by the jets of pure oxygen; several crates of old nitroglycerin have been stacked precariously upon each other; and now various members of Congress are absently patting themselves down, in order to try to find a match.

Joy.

Dec
29
2012
8

Muslim Brotherhood reaches out to Hezbollah.

Ah, the Arab Spring.

Tell me again how marvelous it is that we encouraged the Muslim Brotherhood to take over in Egypt: “In a dramatic policy shift, Egypt will seek to forge “tight” relations with Hezbollah, Egyptian Ambassador to Lebanon Ashraf Hamdy revealed in a candid interview published Saturday in Lebanon’s Daily Star.” Such ‘tight’ relations will presumably include Hezbollah’s right to keep getting ready for that armed conflict with Israel that Hezbollah is supposedly not REALLY getting ready for. Because, of course, nobody in the Middle East has ever preemptively decided to try to attack Israel, ever. (more…)

Dec
28
2012
14

So, I wanted a freaking pork roll sandwich.

For those unaware, pork roll is often referred to as “Taylor ham,” and a sandwich made of it, cheese, pepper, salt, sometimes ketchup, and sometimes egg – all on a hard roll – is a New Jersey delicacy. There are two things that you can’t really get outside of NJ: proper pizza* and a proper pork roll sandwich. I always get both, whenever I’m up here.

FIVE stores in THREE towns before I could find one that took credit cards. I have spent far too long living in the Imperial District…

Moe Lane

*I am perfectly willing to grant that someone from, say, Chicago has a completely different definition of “proper pizza” than I do.

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