Ladies and Gentlemen, permit me to show you the pinnacle of American civilization.

Seriously.  This is one of the three things that they’ll remember about us, ten thousand years from now.  It’s going to be the Moon landing, the various Golden Ages of the Republic*… and the Duck Dynasty Chia Uncle Si Decorative Chia Pet Planter.

…I am content.

Moe Lane

*Right now we have finished up our third a few years ago. Or maybe fourth: depends on how you’re scoring the Twenties.

4 thoughts on “Ladies and Gentlemen, permit me to show you the pinnacle of American civilization.”

  1. I have nothing personal against the Duck Dynasty people, but if I haven’t already given up any hope on humanity, this would be that moment.

    1. Dude. Seriously. You’re posting this on the internet.
      You’re only a few keyclicks away from encountering aspects of humanity that’ll cost you SAN, and make you want to flee the planet–pressurization and oxygen supply optional.
      And a small statue that grows plants as a beard is what’s going to set you off?

  2. My disillusion began when the first leaf-blower rolled off the assembly line, and was confirmed by the production of the Big-Mouthed Billy Bass…

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