Jan
26
2014

New York Times: TREMBLE, mortals, at the power of the Koch Artillery War-Zeppelin!

Seriously,  that’s the image that the New York Times is going with in their editorial “The Koch Party.”  EXPLICITLY.

Only a few weeks into this midterm election year, the right-wing political zeppelin is fully inflated with secret cash and is firing malicious falsehoods at supporters of health care reform.

…honestly? I just stopped reading at that point.  Mostly because I go distracted by the possibilities; if the Koch Brothers are handing out War Zeppelins then I want mine to be cyberpunk, with electro-cannons and a steam organ.  And maybe ornithopters.  Yes, definitely ornithopters: otherwise, there’s no freaking point.

Moe Lane (crosspost)

PS: I am taking this editorial as seriously as it deserves.  Look, you throw Artillery War-Zeppelins right over the plate, fat, slow, and happy: I’m going to take a swing at it.

21 Comments

  • BigGator5 says:

    Hey, can I be you War Zeppelin’s first-mate?

    • Moe_Lane says:

      Sorry: I believe that the rule there is that the second-in-command has to be cross-sex, with an eyepatch (if the captain doesn’t have one). You want to be in charge of the boarding parties? They’re mechanical, and have lava guns…

      • acat says:

        I am available for the role of snarky sidekick. Other than not being a toaster, I appear to fit the bill.
        .
        That said, I will fully understand if I’m demoted to Token Evil Teammate.
        .
        Mew

        • midwestconservative says:

          I want to be Helmsman ( does the War Zeppelin have those?) if not that then I want to be chief navigator.

      • BigGator5 says:

        I’m down with being the boarding leader.
        .
        *joins Moe’s War Zeppelin*
        .
        I have come here to chew bubble gum and kick liberal ass… *loads lava gun* …and I am all out of gum.

    • Jeffstag says:

      I’ll sign up as a Sparrowhawk pilot.

    • Spegen says:

      Sign me up for the role of mad inventor.

  • Crawford says:

    Uh-oh. If there are zeppelins, doesn’t that mean we’re in an alternate reality?
    .
    Or is it the NYT that’s in an alternate reality?

  • Luke says:

    Do Kenneth Hite and Larry Correia know about this?

  • acat says:

    So .. Zeppelins. First, make sure you get a good chemist so some idiot with a Barrett and some white phosphorous rounds can’t repeat Lakehurst.
    .
    Mew

  • earlgrey says:

    I read the editorial and the comments were unbelievable. These people must be living on a different planet. They sincerely see themselves as victims of the Kochs. There was nothing in the comments that indicated any kind of awareness of the negative (is there any other kind?) impacts of Obmacare.

  • Cameron says:

    First off, I’m the zeppelin that is by itself and obviously a helpless target. It’s when you see the skulls of previous boarding parties that you realize the mistake.
    .
    Secondly, if we’re so powerful, why are we permitting these people to exist? It’s not that I’m not advocating genocide. I just want some peace and quiet.

    • Brian Swisher says:

      “…the zeppelin that is by itself and obviously a helpless target. ”
      .
      That’s why it carries the squadrons of biplane fighters. With lava guns!

      • Cameron says:

        Don’t forget the steam-powered Gatling guns. And the Tesla-inspired main cannon that fires a Peace Ray (Thank you, Larry Correia).

    • acat says:

      Your second point is the conservative political dilemma in a nutshell .. we don’t want to engage in this petty bullshit, we want to be left alone to live our lives, but if we aren’t engaged, the various statist pricks aren’t content to do the same, so .. damned if we do, damned if we don’t.
      .
      Mew

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