The Machete Order for watching Star Wars films.

This is from 2011, but my wife told me about today, so I don’t care. Machete Order is a modified version of a way to watch the Star Wars flicks… oh, let him describe it to you.

I’d like to modify this into what I’ve named Machete Order on the off chance that this catches on because I’m a vain asshole.

Next time you want to introduce someone to Star Wars for the first time, watch the films with them in this order: IV, V, II, III, VI

Notice something? Yeah, Episode I is gone.

To make it simpler: the way we learned it it would be Star Wars, Empire, Attack of the Clones,  Revenge of the Sith, Jedi, with Phantom Menace tossed out in the trash.  And, do you know something?  This is exactly how the series should be watched. Everybody must do it this way now! Science demands it!

SCIENCE DEMANDS IT!

10 thoughts on “The Machete Order for watching Star Wars films.”

  1. I’ve always said just substitute in Weird Al’s ‘The Saga Begins’ for Episode I. It contains all the pertinent info. Although personally, I like Episode I a ton more than the steaming pile of excrement that was Episode III. That movie I saw a midnight showing on opening night, bought the DVD which has never been removed from the shrink wrap because it would have been a hole on the DVD shelf, and have never watched more than 5 minutes of it since at a time. But it does contain more needed info than I, so I guess you need to suffer through it for completeness.

  2. The first movie and a half were fine films. What did you think the Fall of the Republic was going to look like? It had to be a bureaucratic collapse, if it had been the Spanish Civil War in Space, the Death Star would not have been a surprise. Just wish they had keep Count Dooku as the poor, doomed hero…..

  3. You must have missed the “Big Bang Theory” episode where they discussed this…

  4. There is Star Wars, The Empire Strikes Back, and Return of the Jedi.
    There are no others.
    Any clone who says differently is a commiemutanttraitor.

  5. As much as I hate Jar-Jar and midichlorians, I would not give up the pod race or Darth Maul for anything.

  6. Star Wars III deserves permanent exile for turning badass Darth Vader into a mewling pussy.

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