Jan
20
2016

Quote of the Day, Tremble In Fear At This Speculation edition.

The leadup will take too long to explain, so just click through, this one time. OK? OK.  So heeeeeere’s the quote:

…With JJ Abrams having helmed both the Star Trek and Star Wars movie franchises, this is the sign that the worst idea for a crossover event ever is in the works and there’s nothing we can do to stop it. It’s the theoretical universe-destroying contact between Redshirts that must always die and Stormtroopers that must always miss. If any of us survive and manage to rebuild our lost civilization, remember to keep the knowledge of where our hubris became too great and brought our works to ruin.

There’s only one reason why this can’t happen.  Disney owns Star Wars. Paramount owns Star Trek. I don’t think that either company is willing to let the other get its dirty mitts on each other’s intellectual property.

Moe Lane

PS: The Federation would kick the Empire’s asses, of course.

23 Comments

  • prayerborne says:

    I just had a similarly ghastly but potentially way cool thought…what if the increasingly militarized Federation of the two Star Trek reboot movies is on its way to becoming the Empire of the Mirror Universe? I’m sure there are a zillion posts on this topic out there, but _I_ just thought of it…

  • Luke says:

    Bollocks.
    The Federation has better Capital Ships, but not much else going for them.
    The Empire has far better mobility, is focused on ground assault in a way that the Federation cannot hope to match, has much better SigInt with a flagship being able to indiscriminately probe an entire galaxy, and oh yeah, magic–especially precognition.
    .
    Seriously, the Federation’s best chance is to fortress up and hope internal schisms tear the Empire apart.

    • Robert Mitchell Jr. says:

      Ah, but fighters probably won’t do well against area effect phasers. And the Federation can fight FTL, which the Empire cannot match. The Federation has replicators, which, again, the Empire cannot match. And it’s not like there’s not a lot of magic (Sorry, psychic powers) in the Federation, and in vastly more numbers. Both low and high level, from Vulcans to Organians……

      Seriously, the Federation would kick the Empire’s but, and that’s before we consider what the Rebellion would be doing while the fight went on.

      • Luke says:

        Empire can go rim to hub in a matter of minutes.
        Federation maxes out at 8x the speed of light. (Unless they’ve increased it since I last paid attention.)
        Even if Federation can fight FTL (and there a great deal of inconsistences with that argument) there will only be combat when and where the Empire chooses.
        Or, in the famous words of Admiral Ahkbar: a trap.
        .
        Last I checked, starships could not be replicated. Nor could their energy sources be. Or people, for that matter.
        Empire capital ships are set up for orbital bombardment and ground support. They also have a demonstrated willingness to engage in Total War.
        .
        Combine that with the Empire’s overwhelming speed advantage and better Intel gathering?
        Empire wins. Easily.
        .
        Of course, Glen Cook’s Guardships would eat them both for breakfast.

        • Dave R says:

          At only 8c, they wouldn’t to Vulcan and back in a five-year mission. Warp 8 on the NG scale is a little over 1000c (which is slower than Star Wars, but nowhere near that ‘slow’).

  • Mikey NTH says:

    First – both governments would have to train their navies to operate as coordinated groups. It is not “every ship for itself.” They would have to learn to operate in self-supporting pairs, then larger groups – say, call them “flotillas” or “divisions” or – really getting wild – Task Groups.

    Second – work out the concept of “battery directed fire.” You know, where anti-fighter weapons covering the same area of the ship are grouped together and fired en mass at a target designated by the director through the information received by the spotters. Sort of like seventy years ago?

    Third – have the main weapons fire in salvos, so that one dose of hurt is arriving (and misses are being corrected for) as another “care package” is being readied.

    Make star navies that are obviously created by intelligent people fight like they were created by intelligent people.

    • nicklevi86 says:

      DS9 kinda dis that with the Dominion War. They still erred towards “shiny” over realistic, but they moved in that direction.

  • Compound says:

    It depends on how the Warp Drive works for whomever writes the script. We know that Star Wars uses hyperspace, so when they’re travelling FTL, they’re outside of the actual universe. All the actual fighting they do is at sublight speeds.
    .
    But the Feds? Well, Star Trek has defined the Warp drive in a dozen different ways over the years. The Technical Manual describes it as basically shoving the space in front of the ship behind it, so that they’re still in real space. Other times, they’re just moving faster than light. Still others say that you can move in Warp but not fight. It’s a mess that changes from episode to episode, movie to movie and book to book. But it the Feds, Klingons, Cardies, Ferengi or whomever can fight at Warp speed, then the Empire would lose every fight. It doesn’t matter the power of the shields or the turbolasers. If something’s travelling 10x the speed of light, you’re not going to be able to hit it without blind luck or Sith powers, and there’s only two folks who might be able to do that in the Empire. “Interdictor Cruisers…” you start to say. Again, sometimes the Warp drive works inside a system, sometimes it doesn’t. Given that I did an STO mission yesterday where I moved around a star at warp speed, I suspect most of the time it does. Adding a gravity well wouldn’t drop them out of warp speed. The Empire’s fleet would die from a million pinpricks from invisible attackers. Or they might be stomped if it’s “Impulse Only fights.” Or the exotic techs for the Feddies (Transporters, replicators, anti-matter) might be the important tech and the Imps die from transporter bombs into the reactors. Or the SFB Feds might show up, who tend to be a wee bit better in a fight. It all depends on who’s writing the Feddie tech.
    .
    Yes, I did spend a lot of time arguing this on Usenet back in the day.

  • Compound says:

    Oh, and a shorter, alternate take.
    .
    It all depends on if the Feds can beat John McClaine.
    .
    See, we know that McClaine can destroy the Death Star. So if the Federation can beat him, they can beat the Imperials too.
    ( http://www.grudge-match.com/History/mcclane-deathstar.shtml )

  • ChrisValentine says:

    Oh, come on. The Empire, or the Republic, would wipe the floor with the Federation. Every single field of technology is superior, other than transporters. Here, the comparisons between an Acclamator-class ship and a Galaxy-class ship. Mind you, an Acclamator is a troop transport, while a the Federation flagship is a Galaxy-class.

    http://www.stardestroyer.net/Empire/Essays/FiveMinutes.html

    Acclamators are orders of magnitude more powerful. Its no contest.

    • Moe_Lane says:

      “Every single field of technology is superior, other than transporters.”

      …How many fleets do you think the Imperials would lose before they realized that the Federation was transporting photon torpedoes INSIDE their reactor cores? I’m thinking ‘most.’

      • ChrisValentine says:

        You can’t transport through shields.

        • Moe_Lane says:

          My wife pointed that out.

        • Robert Mitchell Jr. says:

          Ah, true for “Star Trek” shields, yes. “Star Wars” shields seem to operate on a whole different principle, and are definitely much weaker, as shown when a crashing X-wing takes out all of a Star Destroyer’s shields, and it’s bridge, and also the great reluctance of Imperial fleets to enter asteroid fields……..

          • ChrisValentine says:

            – Crashing A-Wing, not X-Wing
            – The Executor’s shields had already been penetrated, due to combined barrages from the entirety of the Rebel Fleet’s warships, and fighters strafing from to take out the generators of the already weakened shields.

            Anyway, as the previous link I provided shows, prequel-era troop transports were equipped with shields that were capable of dissipating trillions of gigawatts of energy, while the Enterprise was only capable of dissipating thousands. Or, put another way: An Acclamator’s shields are about 23 million times as powerful as the Enterprise’s. And, again, this is comparing a troop transport to a flagship.

  • Patrick Thomas says:

    But we all know that neither would last any significant amount of time against the Vorlons or the Shadows.

    • Cameron says:

      You beat me to it.
      .
      “We are the Borg. Surrender your vessel and prepare to be assimilated.”
      .
      *Wheezing noise from Vorlon Planet Killer* “No.”
      .
      *Borg cube vanishes in a cloud of superheated gas*

  • Jim in Virginia says:

    Let’s get serious. The Sith travel sideways in space time to rescue Sauron as the Ring is destroyed . Gandalf must team up with the Enterprise and the Rebel alliance as the only person who can save everyone’s ass is James T. Kirk. Kirk gets to spend quality time with Galadriel.
    Oh, and zombies.

  • Skip says:

    Since we know that the Federation is the same universe as Larry Niven’s Known Space from the animated series, clearly who wins would boil down to who found the right weapons in a Slaver stasis box.

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