Mar
02
2016

Mitt Romney to give a speech tomorrow.

:Raised eyebrow: According to his staff it’s not an endorsement and not an announcement. And if it’s a lecture about civility in this campaign, well, that ship has sailed.  Which may not stop Mitt Romney anyway, given that the man must be absolutely appalled at the way that Donald Trump has more or less single-handedly coarsened the national debate. God knows that I am.

Still, maybe it’ll be about something else.  Heck, maybe he’ll just troll Donald Trump for two hours.  I’d be happy to watch that:  “So, let me tell you something.  Me and the boys at Bain – you know, the people who made the real money in NYC – we all noticed Don’s hands. You didn’t want to look at them, but you did.  I always felt bad about that.  I mean -” holding up hands ” – I was blessed with long, shapely hands.  I, mean, just look at these hands.  Good Mormon hands. My family’s had these hands for over a hundred years.  Great-Granddad Miles first got these hands when he went down to Mexico with his wives – oh, yeah, Great-Granddad had almost as many wives as Donnie did, only, you know, not one at a time – so I always felt bad for Donnie when he shook my hand.  It didn’t seem fair to grind a man’s face into the dirt over his hands.”

“I’ll say this for Don-a-rino, though: he works those hands. Special cuticle strengtheners, stretching exercises, the whole thing.  He’s never given up on trying to get those hands of his up to average, and do you know something?  Bless him for it. God bless him for it. That’s an inspiration for the rest of us.”

…or something like that.

10 Comments

  • Skip says:

    He’s probably going to talk about how if we nominate someone who’s not a conservative, and has only recently and not very believably started claiming conservative beliefs, that we need to not vote for him.

  • tomiathon says:

    *snicker*

    that’s some funny stuff right there, Moe

  • acat says:

    … I can’t see much good coming out of it, but I’d like to be proven wrong.
    .
    Mew

    • Mikey NTH says:

      I’m going to agree with you acat. Unless Mitt comes out and says something like “I understand why you are upset, you believe that we broke faith with you. That is not true and we will prove that to you starting now. Donald Trump is not the answer you are seeking, he isn’t.”

      Unless there is an acknowledgement about why people are upset then Mitt is going to have no more effect than any of the people that have gone before him.

  • Aruges says:

    Supposedly, he’ll be laying out the case against Trump. I guess he thinks he’ll be able to get through to people who won’t listen to others. I have my doubts.

    • Dave R says:

      Sadly, I think most of us who kind of liked Mitt and every time Obama or Hillary or Trump or Bernie say or do something new that’s insane wonder what the heck voters were thinking in re-electing Obama are already pretty solidly on team #NeverTrump.

  • Catseyes says:

    Directing it at any future Christie’s in the party, not at the Pro-Trump forces. Which seems like a good idea to me as most pro-Trump people don’t seem to have a very high opinion of Romney. Of course the failed sanity roll picture says volumes all by itself on why not to endorse Trump. Oh, and hands with long fingers are known as strangler’s hands.

    • Moe_Lane says:

      That will depend on what faction of Trump’s nascent coalition Romney might be trying to convince. If he goes Full Metal My Father Was A Civil Rights Icon then that will have an effect on disaffected Democrats who nonetheless despise the Klan like all good Americans do.

  • Lady Penguin says:

    Mitt Romney, good man that he is, did a poor job of standing up to Obama in the debates. Too nice, too naive, or listened to the wrong consultants, same result. Not going to rehash what might have been. This is the here and now, and Romney giving a speech isn’t going to change the trajectory of this election cycle. The Establishment may see him as senior, wise mentor of the party, but not the grassroots, not anymore.

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