I’d say blame this, but it’s not really her fault, is it? No. No, it is not. Also, I take the side of those who say that ‘seizuring’ is a word.
Chinchillas – Basic Briefing Sheet – Google Docs
Chinchillas – Basic Briefing Sheet
The domestic chinchilla (Chinchilla lanigera) is a small South American rodent most often encountered in either the fur industry, or as a pet. Wild chinchillas (which are currently officially listed as ‘endangered’) have a slight susceptibility to inimical supernatural energy: this trait has been amplified to a drastic degree in domesticated strains. Simply put: expose a chinchilla to evil magic, and it gets a seizure and likely dies.
This trait is simultaneously useful and problematic. It is useful because having a biological, self-replicating supernatural one-time proximity alert is much cheaper in both materials and manpower than previous methods. It is problematical because chinchillas are relatively popular pets among a certain percentage of the Masses: our job of suppressing successful evocations of Dark Magic is quite difficult enough without having the aforementioned proximity alerts suddenly seizuring and dying where a civilian can see them.
Contrary to popular belief among the Masses, Dark Magic is pretty much the only reason why chinchillas have seizures; quite an elaborate if not baroque mythology has arisen on how to keep one’s chinchilla alive in a hostile world. We have encouraged this, because the alternative is to possibly have the Masses discover just how much Dark Magic is actually out there at any given time. Having the latter occur has been deemed to be a suboptimal result.
One last note: if you think that you have a need for a chinchilla in the field, requisition one from the Toybox. Do not take one from a child, if for no other reason than the Men in Black have standards. Besides, using a named animal for probably fatal ends comes perilously close to engaging in a ritual sacrifice. Never engage in an unplanned ritual sacrifice: as certain of our colleagues like to note, you never know Who might be listening…