My spoiler-free review of Spider-Man: Homecoming.

Short version: …why are you still reading this?  You can probably still find a 10 PM showing somewhere.  Go on, stop reading this, find your car keys and go see it.  GO!

Somewhat longer version: Spider-Man: Homecoming is a real good teenager flick where the hero just happens to be, you know, Spider-Man. The casting was excellent, from the top down*, and the plot moves pretty sturdily.  It is a touch long, but I forgave them for it readily enough.  There’s a lot of laughter points in the movie, and it just simply works as a stealth origin story movie where the focus is on Peter Parker coming to terms with his new abilities.

Whoever first proposed this deal at Sony is probably doing his or her best to avoid being unduly smug, for the sake of a tranquil office environment.  But it’s gonna be hard.  It’s gonna be so exceptionally hard.

Moe Lane

PS: Twentieth Century Fox needs to face reality.  They don’t have what it takes to make an amazing Fantastic Four movie. They don’t even have what it takes to make what would be an acceptably good long-term franchise.  So they need to admit that Marvel has won so that they can get in line to insert the Fantastic Four into the MCU and stop being so damnably stiff-necked about things.  I mean, TCF likes money, right?  They have to like insane amounts of money.  They’re a motion picture studio, after all.

*Especially, you know, that one person. You’ll know what I mean when you get that far in the movie. Speaking of which, if you’re reading this then you’re probably either not going to the movie, or you’re reading this in the car.  Stop that.

6 thoughts on “My spoiler-free review of Spider-Man: Homecoming.”

  1. Got off work early to run an errand, finished up just in time to make it to the 5:05 showing. LOVED IT. don’t know what you mean by “That one person” Unless you mean that chick who says “my friends call me __” at the end. Thought it was funny that Peter Parker seems to be the only white kid in his entire school. Did you stay all the way through the credits to catch BOTH end credit scenes?

  2. So, how was the Stan Lee cameo, have you heard the theory that he is Uatu?

  3. One thing that really worked for me were the subtle clues that, despite Peter feeling totally out of the loop, that Tony was really keeping up with all of his reports. On the other hand, the conceit of having Happy constantly ignoring Peter didn’t work as well, from a logical standpoint. If Tony was willing to give the Spiderman suit its own AI assistant, couldn’t that assistant (or a comparable one) have been the liaison instead of Happy?

    Also, Michelle was just annoying, for obvious reasons.

    1. True on Michelle. Fortunately, she didn’t have much to do in the film. And by the time they start shooting the next one the actress should hopefully no longer be the Flavor of the Month.

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