Vorpal Snowglobe – Google Docs
The Vorpal Snowglobe
Appearance: a snow globe with snowflakes and a wooden snowman in it.
The Vorpal Snowglobe would normally be considered a hideous blasphemy, given the materials that it’s made out of. The glass was melted down from sand gathered in Mecca; the water inside it was taken from the headwaters of the Ganges. The wooden figurine found inside of it was carved from a piece of the True Cross, and the ‘snowflakes’ are actually fragments of bones from a hundred saints of a dozen faiths. In short, everything in the Snowglobe is arguably a perversion of one religious tradition or another.
On the other hand: nothing big-letter Evil can touch or harm it, nothing big-letter Evil will voluntarily go within ten feet of it, and if you tie down something big-letter Evil and touch it with the Vorpal Snowglobe, the big-letter Evil promptly explodes. Even showing it to a demon is enough to trigger an immediate exorcism. The Vorpal Snowglobe snaps curses like they were rotten twigs. And so on, and so on, and so on.
And, on the gripping hand? The Vorpal Snowglobe does not register as a holy or unholy item, on any of the standard tests. This is pretty much impossible, given that the materials — and the use that they’ve been put to — should ping as being either Good or Evil. But they don’t. Theurgically speaking, the Vorpal Snowglobe is effectively inert.
The various contradictions involved in this item have spawned a nigh-infinite variety of theories, ranging from “The LORD’s tests are subtle and mysterious” to “This is an amazingly clever ploy by the Adversary” to “None of the religions are real and we need a new cosmo-theological theory” to “All faiths are real and here is the proof.” And everything in between. Various mystic and religious organizations have possessed the Vorpal Snowglobe, in the twenty years that it’s been around; it changes hands with surprising regularity. In fact, it’s widely (and probably accurately) believed that more than one group has encouraged that the Snowglobe get stolen by rivals, if only to stop the internal wrangling that owning the relic seems to provoke.