Oct
23
2017

Tweet of the Day, Guess Who’s Making A Dora The Explorer Movie? edition

Most directors, when you say This is gonna be an on-screen train wreck, you expect that to be taken figuratively.  But it’s Michael Bay, so…

Via @calebhowe, who has his own highly entertaining take on the subject. But I don’t know.  I mean, who doesn’t want to see Dora the Explorer help the audience practice saying termita, pirotécnica, and Intencionalmente malinterpretar la naturaleza fundamental de Optimus Prime? I feel that this is a way for Michael Bay to really help benefit the world; I like to think of it as a way to teach others how to swear at the director in Spanish, too.

Moe Lane

PS: I love Google Translate. It’s ideal for all of my incredibly poor translation needs.

 

12 Comments

  • jetty says:

    “Have you seen this show? It’s about a five year old Mexican girl that is always lost. It should be called ‘Dora the Amber Alert'”. — Ralphie May

    • acat says:

      Alas, Ralphie.
      .
      His best bit, IMO, was about seeing Sullenberger’s water landing while trippin’ balls ..
      .
      Sadly, that was about the only of his bits that night we found funny .. the rest was pornographic and/or obscene .. and I’m not a noted prude.
      .
      Mew

  • JustDave says:

    Wait… is this really happening? The linked article reads like this is really gonna be a thing.

    .

    If you’ve ever read Godel, Escher, and Bach, there’s a part where Hofstadter talks about how the length remaining in a story is kind of a spoiler to the story itself (you know it’s almost over, because there’s only so many pages left to read). He proposes a solution where the story continues on after the actual “end”, but in such a preposterous way that the reader knows it’s not part of the real story.

    .

    I kinda feel like that’s what’s happening in real life sometimes.

    • acat says:


      .

      .
      Nah. Even this doesn’t explain Stephen King’s apparent inability to write an ending.
      .
      Mew

    • junior says:

      Peter Jackson apparently tried that method of story-telling in “The Return of the King”.

      😛

      • nicklevi86 says:

        To be fair, Tolkien was *worse*. Jackson actually pared the end down by several chapters.

        • Moe_Lane says:

          I’d pay money to see The Scouring of the Shire as a full-length fantasy insurgency movie.

          • acat says:

            That .. was one of the disappointing parts of the “mega happy ending” Jackson gave us.
            .
            In the Jackson version, the Shire was completely untouched .. which was a cop-out.
            .
            The different ways Sam (and Merry and Pippin) and Frodo dealt with the post-Saruman Shire was (in my opinion) one of the best parts of the story.
            .
            Some come home and work to make home better, some are never able to fully come home and .. drop out.
            .
            Instead of fighting each other over this, Sam (and Pippin and Merry) recognize where Frodo is, and do their best to protect him.
            .
            Mew

  • Aruges says:

    But why? But why, though?

  • Gnarledhotep says:

    Now Michael Bay is doing a reboot of the live-action Dora?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TnpTcrtsN3U

    🙂

  • Luke says:

    Ok, I have to admit that I find this delightfully funny.
    .
    He’s likely the best man for the job. Anyone else, and we’d have to wonder if he was going to try and play the ridiculous concept straight.
    With Michael Bay, that worry just exploded, and Dora doesn’t look back.

  • Mordineus says:

    Not as nutty as it sounds, this movie will be primarily targeted at the international market, and Bay apparently knows what it takes for that market.

    But yeah, I am kinda thinking that it is going to be pretty darn close to the vid that Gnarledhotep linked, and stink worse than week old diapers.

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