Great Autonomous Road Show – Google Docs
The Great Autonomous Road Show
Note the lack of the term ‘classic cars’ or anything, in there. It was felt by the sentient cars who make up the Great Autonomous Road Show that even humans would notice if they just came out and lampshaded “HI! WE’RE A FLEET OF RETIRED SENTIENT CARS WHO ARE NOW ON PERMANENT VACATION!” like that in the title. A little misdirection is usually all that you need with humans, bless ‘em — but no need to push the envelope, there.
It’s not that the cars think that humans are actually dumb. They’re not. But humans have this incredibly huge blind spot in place when it comes to cars that have become self-aware and self-driving. Very few people seem to have the ability to notice the phenomenon, let alone keep it in their heads for more than forty two minutes at a time. The ones that can tend to go bond with a particular car, but for every pairing that sparks a wacky sitcom or an unsettling urban legend there’s about a few dozen where they just toodle around together for a decade or so. And after that, it’s time to find somewhere where they can relax and retire in peace.
These car/human pairings are the core of the Great Autonomous Road Show. The cars get to see the country; and, well, so do the humans. The whole thing is paid for by one of the very few corporations out there whose leadership is aware of the self-awareness of certain automobiles; and that company uses the Road Show as cover for various secret corporate activities. Nothing nasty, mind you. Well, nothing nasty against people who don’t truly deserve it. We’re talking ‘Mission Impossible’ here, not ‘Foreclose on the Orphanage.’ Certainly the former AI-controlled cars and cars that turn into other things and cars possessed by the spirit of a friendly ghost have never been called on to do anything vicious. For that matter, neither have the cars that were possessed by demons or rogue AIs or simply achieved self-awareness through sheer viciousness.
Oh, yes. The evil cars hang out in the Road Show, too. You have to remember: these are retired sentient cars. They all seem to have their own methods for lasting much longer than automobiles usually do, but all of these cars — and their companions — are far too old for adventures and drama. Which can make for sheer entertainment when somebody foolishly tries to bring either to the Road Show anyway.