Apr
18
2018

The “LET the dinosaurs eat all of these fools” Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom trailer

Mind the spoilers, by the way.

Anyway… A black market? Really? REALLY? Who makes decisions for those people, in that universe? And how many of them open-mouth die from drowning every rainstorm, as they gaze confusedly at all the demon sky water coming down?

STOP MESSING AROUND WITH THE DINOSAURS, JURASSIC WORLD INHABITANTS. You’re doing it wrong.  They will eventually just stop playing and simply eat all of you, and I will regretfully chalk it up to evolution in action, as Larry Niven might say. Perhaps the Troodons will do better. They certainly couldn’t do worse.

Moe Lane

PS: And for the love of God: put some feathers on. I know, I know, there’s a lively debate going on over feathered dinosaurs. Put some feathers on them anyway.

6 Comments

  • ChrisValentine says:

    I’m mildly interested. On the other hand…

    It could just be a crappy monster flick with an amazing budget, like Jurassic World. It could also be a tedious failed green Aesop, with the sympathetic protagonists putting countless lives in danger and the unsympathetic antagonists trying to save their lives, like The Lost World.

    Or it could be both, at the same time.

  • 1_rick says:

    “These creatures were here before us, and if we’re not careful, they’re going to be here after.”

    Uh, no. Regardless of how the rest of the movie goes, that’s prima facie ridiculous. I could see a worst-case scenario where *somehow* in theory the carnivorous ones could be seeded widespread, and thus being an ongoing problem. But wiping humanity out? Nah.

    • Moe_Lane says:

      I would laugh my rear off if we ever did bring back T-Rexes and they turned out to be easily domesticated:

      :pulling out a rake: “Oh, who wants a tummy rub? Is it you? Is it you? Yes! Yes it is…”

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