In Nomine Revisited: Beliar, Calabite of Dark Humor.

Beliar – Google Docs


Calabite of Dark Humor

Corporeal Forces: 5 Strength: 10 Agility: 10
Ethereal Forces: 3 Intelligence: 6 Precision: 6
Celestial Forces: 4 Will: 8 Perception: 8

Vessel: Annoyed looking male/5

Skills: Dodge/4, Fighting/6, Large Weapon/6 (Chainsaw), Ranged Weapon/6 (shotgun)

Songs: Fire (All/3), Entropy (Corporeal/3, Ethereal/3), Might (Corporeal/2), Numinous Corpus (Acid/3, Claws/3), Shields (All/2)

Attunements: Calabite of Dark Humor, Prank, Farce of Mistaken Identity, We’ve Secretly Replaced

Discord: Angry/3

Beliar is like a clown, really: he only smiles on the outside. Inside, he cries. Admittedly, said crying is usually along the lines of “Will those God-damned talking monkeys please stop BOTHERING me?!”, but it still sort of counts.

You see, it’s like this. Note how close Beliar’s name is to a certain Prince? Well, it’s even worse in Helltongue: in fact, Beliar and Belial’s (the Demon Prince of Infernal Fire) True Names have only one bit of difference to them. A small, easily mispronounced difference — especially when the entity doing the pronouncing is a human trying to wrap his tongue and larynx around a language that was deliberately not designed for either. Add to this the well-known propensity for Sorcerers to bite off more than they can chew, and… well, now you know why the Calabite’s got the Angry Discord. Indeed, given the circumstances, he’s actually shown a fair amount of self-control about the situation.

It’s not so much the fact that Beliar gets inadvertently Summoned all the time: it’s the fact that he always meets the really clumsy and/or dumb Sorcerers. The adept ones don’t botch the rituals, and the smart ones know not to mess with Demon Princes. Beliar’s unfortunate name has pretty much botched his chances for advancement: he’s got a pretty decent Will, but they just never stop calling, and you can’t block it all, and they always call at the worse moment, and so on, and so on, and so on.

So, by now Beliar has gotten to the point where any Summoning of him is liable to end in — well, ‘tragedy’ depends on your viewpoint. He won’t immediately rip a Sorcerer to shreds; Beliar himself isn’t a fool,  and he knows that Kronos (the Demon Prince of Fate) already has it in for Servitors of Dark Humor. No sense in aggravating Kronos by breaking his toys.

However, the Calabite’s motto is, “If I’m going to be Summoned instead of Belial, then you’re going to damn well treat me like Belial”. There will be beer. There will be a comfortable chair. There will be female eye candy, wearing a minimum of clothing. There will be a lot of genuflecting, prostrating and general metaphorical kissing of Beliar’s demonic posterior. There will be all of these things, brought forth with all due speed, or there will be trouble. Trouble usually manifests itself with a shotgun blast to the head of the most tiresome Sorcerer present, usually followed by more shotgun blasts and general carnage.

Word’s getting around. The panicky sudden inclusion of reclining chairs and ice chests to the standard Sorcerous equipment list has sufficiently amused Kobal (Beliar’s Prince) that he lets Beliar continue on his merry way. Indeed, the Laughing Prince is pleased with the unexpected consequences that arose from Kobal giving Beliar his True Name in the first place: it was just supposed to annoy Belial.

It’s always nice when a Prank on one Prince slops on over into the life of another, especially when the other is Kronos.

The material presented here is my original creation, intended for use with the In Nomine and GURPS systems from Steve Jackson Games. This material is not official and is not endorsed by Steve Jackson Games.

In Nomine and GURPS are registered trademarks of Steve Jackson Games, and the art here is copyrighted by Steve Jackson Games. All rights are reserved by SJ Games. This material is used here in accordance with the SJ Games online policy.


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