Apr
19
2017
9

The endearingly bloodily folkloric ‘Siren’ trailer.

I will say this for the Siren trailer: the mermaid in it looks properly alarming.

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Apr
18
2017
3

The SLLLOOWWWEDDD DOWWWN Kingsman 2 teaser trailer.

This may be cheating, but you can’t expect to do a ten second quick-cut trailer and not have the Internet take that as a personal challenge. Somebody is going to step up and adjust it frame by freaking frame. Just to say that they did.

Kingsman: The Golden Circle* will drop September 29th.

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Apr
18
2017
7

The ‘(Lemme Just Roll My Eyes Here) Krypton’ trailer.

I’m going to be honest, here: I watch stuff like the Krypton trailer, and I think to myself Why the heck didn’t they just all move?

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Apr
17
2017
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Soooo… Alien: Covenant is gonna suck, huh?

They’re already resorting to found footage to promote Alien: Covenant.

:pause:

OK, I stopped caring about this franchise after Aliens, like many other people, but: that makes no sense in this kind of setting. The entire point of ‘found footage’ is to promote a feeling that this horror story is actually going on, only it’s been covered up or declared a fake.  That doesn’t really work when you know perfectly well that there are no interstellar colonization efforts going on right now.

And I say this as somebody who will watch and like found footage movies. I enjoyed the hell out of Cloverfield, for example. But this ain’t doing it for me.

Apr
14
2017
1

The ‘The Last Jedi’ teaser trailer.

I… find that I am in agreement with Luke’s last comment, there.  It is time.  Far past time. The Last Jedi is also probably not going to be a clone of The Empire Strikes Back, which is nice.

Apr
13
2017
5

Just watched the Iron Fist pilot while on the treadmill.

I personally thought that it was fine. Nice setup, reasonable amount of action, not too much in the way of inexplicable behavior.  I’ll likely be alternating Iron Fist and Agents of SHIELD for the next couple of weeks or so.  Marvel’s TV shows are pretty good for the treadmill, honestly.

Apr
12
2017
9

‘The Wizard of Lies’ trailer.

This is the Bernie Madoff movie that has Robert De Niro and Michelle Pfeiffer in it, and I personally would not have starred in it, even in that weird alternate universe where I’m a big-name Hollywood movie star.  Madoff is hated.  I am absolutely convinced that there are multiple hit men currently on retainer against the possibility that Madoff might somehow get out of prison, some day: I for myself would be just the slightest bit worried that playing the role of Bernie Madoff might sufficiently qualify as guilt-by-association.  A very low-probability scenario, sure – but there was a lot of money on that particular table.

Movie comes out May 20th on HBO.

Apr
12
2017
--

This ‘The Osiris Child trailer looks pretty interesting.

It’s an Australian flick, and there’s no real easy way to say ‘The production values look good enough for Hollywood’ without at least subtly insulting the Australian film industry.  Which is unfair: obviously, the Australian film industry is capable of putting together something like The Osiris Child.  What we can see of it so far appeals: (more…)

Apr
11
2017
--

Quote of the Day, I’d Watch This Star Wars Pitch, Sure edition.

Anybody except Guillermo del Toro, though – maybe not.  But I like del Toro’s stuff, even when he’s a little off.  So, sure:

“I would do the sort of Godfather saga that Jabba the Hutt had to go through to gain control. One, because it’s the character that looks the most like me, and I like him. I love the idea of a Hutt type of mafia, a very complex coup. I just love the character.”

Apr
11
2017
5

The rather odd and out-of-mental-sync ‘The Mist’ series trailer.

This adaptation of The Mist… does not look very much like Stephen King’s original short story.

(more…)

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Apr
11
2017
7

The ‘Rogue One’ Honest Trailer.

To be honest, I didn’t have the problem with Rogue One that Honest Trailers had. I enjoyed the flick. It did what it came to do; it was a proof-of-concept by Disney that established that, sure, you could do successful movies in the Star Wars universe that weren’t revolving around the main trilogies.  We’re not talking high cinema, here, but Rogue One was pretty solid.

SPOILERS IN THE TRAILER.

Apr
10
2017
12

The ‘Thor: Hot Darn But I Am THERE Ragnarok’ Trailer.

I am absolutely, totally there.  Because while Marvel – to quote Honest Trailers – is drunk on its own power, it’s a blessedly friendly drunk who said “You wanna see Thor and Hulk gladiator it up in the arena, right?  RIGHT? Because so do we!  And we’re gonna get Jeff Goldblum, just because!”

Seriously, this looks far too good to be the third movie in a franchise. Or sub-franchise.  I’m not sure how to score this.

Moe Lane

PS: It lacked only the record scratching sound.

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