Moe Lane

Cheeky of me, I know.

Songs of the Civil War, Vol 1: Battlefields and Campfires, 97th Regimental String Band

Mostly because I wasn’t aware that The Hobbit was 70 years old this year. How this is more significant than, say, 54 or 87 years old is left as an exercise for the interested student; suffice it to say I look forward to my kids being old enough for me to read them this book.

And so, farewell to The Trade of Queens: Book Six of the Merchant Princes.

…if events today are putting you to the point where everything tastes metallic and you can’t see anything without a pink tinge: go outside. Eat a sandwich. Play a video game. Watch this.

If you’re enjoying it, of course, then by all means keep going.

Because it’s getting intense out there.

Not this one, but a one: Pachelbel’s Canon in D

I should note for the record that this is from my wife’s almost-final Dragon Age run, not mine.

Let’s just say that the wife and I have different opinions about player-character survival, and leave it at that.

Comes out in 2012.

Director? Andrew Stanton.  Oops, hold on: I meant to say WALL-E and Finding Nemo.
Writer? Michael Chabon.
Studio? Disney/Pixar, effectively.

(pause)

It may not suck.

Not a joke: the company has been negotiating the right to use the Commodore name.

Zero footprint, all-in-keyboard, supposedly will run Windows, Linux, and (via user modification) Mac OS. Here are the technical specs: more on this computer here and here.  No word on price, although I don’t expect it to be as cheap as my old C64, even after you adjust for inflation and relative wealth levels then and now.

Bottom line?  Make it beige – real Commodore computers are beige – and I’ll think about it.

I was actually looking for ‘Jeepers Creepers,’ but this works.

‘Body and Soul,’ Mel Torme

…if you’re following the health care debacle, you don’t need a link to know that the pro-choice wing-and-three-quarters of the Democratic party is screaming bloody murder about Pelosi’s latest reversal; and if you’re not, you want me to SHUT UP ABOUT HEALTH CARE.

Fine. Here’s a video of what was possibly the only pet hippo in existence.

If the hippo ended up eating its human owners, don’t tell me.

Moe Lane

PS: Yes, I know that hippos are herbivores.

Guess how old that Happy Meal is in that photo:

It’s a year old – and that’s not an accident, either. Somebody went to school to learn how to produce that feat of culinary engineering.

Moe Lane

…alas, many hopeful Internet projects fail of their promise.  While it lived, though, it produced this:

Julius: Your pardon; did I break thy concentration?
        Continue! Ah, but now thy tongue is still.
        Allow me, then, to offer a retort.
        Describe Marsellus Wallace to me, pray.
Brett:  What?
Julius: What country dost thou hail from?
Brett:  What?
Julius: Thou sayest thou dost hail from distant What!
        I know but naught of thy strange country What.
        What language speak they in the land of What?
Brett:  What?
Julius: English, base knave, dost thou speak it?
Brett:  Aye!
Julius: Then hearken to my words and answer them!
        Describe to me Marsellus Wallace!
Brett:  What?
(JULIUS presses his knife to BRETT's throat)
Julius: Speak 'What' again! Thou cur, cry 'What' again!
        I dare thee utter 'What' again but once!
        I dare thee twice and spit upon thy name!
        Now, paint for me a portraiture in words,
        If thou hast any in thy head but 'What',
        Of Marsellus Wallace!
...

…so it did not utterly fail. (more…)

Cult Of Personality, Living Colour

I am, of course, worried that a segment of my readers will watch the video and wonder where Jim Carrey is.

Even the video game rant that I had scheduled for this slot turned out to be lame.

So it goes.

Here. Have some Cracked: The 5 Most Half-Assed Scams That Were Shockingly Successful.

A few years ago, criminals targeted a large grocery corporation based in Minnesota called SuperValu. They own some of the biggest super market chains in the country, and like all corporations, the dollar is their bottom line. They very tightly monitor every cent that flows in and out of, ah, just kidding! They hurl that shit at anything that moves until it goes away.

See, while the criminal’s plan was to steal millions of dollars from the company–possibly by robbing the company’s armored cars, hacking into the company’s bank accounts or breaking into the company’s headquarters and looting the vault–the options, as you can see, are not easy ones. So they just sent an email to SuperValu asking them to send the money instead; which they did. To the tune of more than $10 million.

No, nothing political in this article. If they had, they wouldn’t have been able to hold it down to five. Or fifty. Or five thousand, probably.

What the hell: it’s practically traditional by now. Real Irish music:

Death Valley Queen, Flogging Molly

Kinda.

Although I could have just as easily picked Toy Story 2 as I did Toy Story: the former was one of those rare sequels that holds up well to the original. Let’s hope that continues.

And so, adieu to District 9.

True, you can get more details from the body of the article, but do you really need them?

“Two suspects were killed after one dressed as a leprechaun and robbed a Gallatin Bank Wednesday afternoon.”

As it stands, it already tells you everything important about what must have turned out to be a very surreal, very Bad Day for at least a half dozen people.  Except for the explicit itemization of the poor life choices involved, but you can probably work them out for yourself.

Thanks to Reader Joseph.

Here, I’ll even put up some Irish music.

NOW SHUT UP ABOUT IT.

Moe Lane

PS: 15/16ths, thank you very much.

Is what you are doing today going to be as cool as this?

Hey, don’t feel bad.  I don’t have anything as cool as this scheduled for today, either.

(Via AoSHQ Headlines)

Moe Lane

Crossposted to RedState.

Look in your heart; you will know this to be true.

The Muppet Wicker Man Comic. Based on the original, not the recent one that I didn’t even bother to watch*.

But beware: some things may not be unseen, once they are seen.

Moe Lane

PS: I will be merciful and not tell you from whom I got this.  Just this once.

*I might have, if I could have come up with a good reason for why there should have been a remake in the first place.