Nihilistic turkeys.

They got nothing to live for, nothing ahead of them to look forward to, and nothing left behind to hold them back.  So why the hell not?  You call this life?

Residents of an Eastside neighborhood may have found relief from a gang that laid siege to the area over the past few months, kicking and biting at people, jamming up traffic and chasing terrified residents into their homes.

The gang – that’s what the U.S. Geological Survey calls a flock of wild turkeys – went after 68-year-old Carol Herzog on Monday, she said.


Officers with the state Department of Natural Resources took down both toms in the gang of six Tuesday morning, likely putting an end to the gang’s rampage.

Via AoSHQ Headlines – and here’s the gem of the piece, by the way.

“If you’re attacked by a person, there’s usually some reasoning, but a turkey has no reason.”

So, basically, this:

Only with turkeys.