“A great day for ducks.”

The Onion reports:

WASHINGTON—The United States Congress passed a law late Wednesday that for the first time in its 222-year history did not result in the sudden and unexpected deaths of thousands of ducks.

The law, designed to track suspicious interstate financial transactions, passed with an overwhelming majority in both houses and did not cause the usual hail of dead ducks to fall from the sky.

“I’m not sure what we did differently with this bill, but suffice it to say, we’re pleasantly surprised by the result,” House Majority Leader Eric Cantor (R-VA) said from the duck-carcass-free steps of the Capitol. “No ducks spontaneously lost their buoyancy and drowned in their ponds, burst into flames, or lined up to be run over by a steamroller. It’s a good day for Americans and a great day for ducks.”

It gets better: I don’t know why that’s the funniest damn thing that I’ve read so far today, but it is and I think that we all need the laugh.

The factory, the government, and the boom.

Let me tell you a story (via Instapundit).

Once upon a time there was a owner of a packaging material factory in Maine who found out one day that there was a major oil leak disaster going on in the Gulf of Mexico.  It turns out that a useful item for oil leak containment – known as ‘floating oil containment boom,’ or just ‘boom’ – was something that the owner’s factory could make; and since business was horrible anyway the owner decided to bring in extra workers and make all the boom that he could.  The Governor of Louisiana was yelling for lots and lots of boom, and surely both British Petroleum and the federal government would be downright eager to buy up the boom as fast as the factory could make it.

Surely. Continue reading The factory, the government, and the boom.