Tossed this off earlier tonight. Thought I’d fix it up some.
Even if no mortal comes this night
To thump up stairs with chill delight
And knock on doors to claim their prize
With breathy laughs and ritual cries...
For even if no life-warm hands
Reach out to make happy demands,
We still will have sweet bounty here:
The Pact we keep, so do not fear.
Come, ye spooks and ghosts in flight,
Attend, you children of the night:
Do not weep, lonely. Take your due;
For at this House, we welcome you.
I’m going to go find some families in our complex more tomorrow and Wednesday. Basically, we have wide-aperture cardboard tubes (two three-footers, bound with duct tape) which we can mount to our railings and slide candy down a socially distanced space to the kids below. I got two other houses to do this, and I can get another nine with the tubes we got. There’s a guy around here who always does bouncy displays for Halloween. He’ll go for this, bless me if he won’t.
PS: Because it’s Halloween, and I decline to just give that up without a fight.
I love Penny Arcade, but this situation is not the Apocalypse. It is, to quote Eric Flint, simply a problem to be solved.
And we have solved it. Two wide-aperture three-foot cardboard tubes, secured with duct tape, and fixed to our stoop’s bannister. A box at the bottom to collect the candy. The angle is steep enough that the candy can and does travel freely to the bottom. There! Social distancing achieved, and problem solved. We even have cardboard tubes for our neighbors.
…but when they got to the true crime podcasters in that movie, well. Honest Trailers had views on them, let me tell you. Somewhat waspish views, too. The kind that professionals have when Hollywood gets the technical details wrong. Seriously, listening to said views was what made me put this one up.
It was for the Secret World Legends poetry contest, which is why it may seem a bit obscure. Still, I rather liked writing it. PDF at the public Patreon.
Have you embraced and chased the Broadcast’s Lord?
A hiss of static truth, Presenting lore
Profoundly hid in math’s relentless chord,
Placed close to deaths; which warns what is in store.
You’ll search in graves, walk with the restless dead
Half-trapped between this clumsy world and next;
And when their numbers burn inside your head
Look then to get a sane man’s frantic text.
Long trip you’ll make, to vampire-haunted lands.
On Gaia’s quest you’ll be, to put down ghosts
Who picked unholy halls to make their stands;
Excise them all, confront their tattered host.
Extend this Age’s grasp, and end His reign.
No dead may rule. Not even at Samhain.
I think that they had the right idea, here. Just hack away everything that wasn’t the first Halloween — ah, the first-first Halloween movie — and go on from there. Continuity? Heh. Slasher movies, my friends: slasher movies. Call it an ‘alternate timeline’ if you like, and go on from there.
Besides, I hear that the suddenly-only sequel is pretty good. That makes it easier to get away with this sort of thing.