Moe Lane

I get the impression that Universal Monsters: The Essential Collection is going to be what Universal draws from for their Dark Universe franchise (plus, of course, Dr. Jeckyll & Mr. Hyde). That second link indicates that The Bride of Frankenstein is next up, and that something involving The Invisible Man is definitely on the calendar.  Assuming that the Mummy doesn’t crash and burn, of course.

Anyway, I should ask for this collection for Christmas.

Since the new Mummy is coming out pretty soon, time to put up the one from 1999.  I am very fond of this movie. Why? Not least, because of this scene.

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Why The Blob? Because I looked up the original, only to have it…

:puts on sunglasses:

…suck me in.

And so, adieu to Miracle. (more…)

…How the heck did I manage to not do Miracle before this? Today, of course, is the anniversary of a day that was an absolutely needed shot in the arm for the United States of America.

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I’d call this feature something else, except that I’m pretty much locked into it at this point. Anyway: Arrival is coming out on DVD in two weeks, and if you missed it the first time then you should correct that.  This is the kind of science fiction flick that will infuriate you about Hollywood, because they can clearly make movies like this, but won’t. And there’s no excuse. It was a hit. It racked up a bunch of Oscar nominations, including some of the ones that the studios most like to brag about. I am an unrepentant blow-em-up, popcorn-movie guy, and I raved about Arrival.  And now Hollywood will go back to making stupid (in both senses of the word) movies that nobody likes, because God forbid they should challenge their audi… sorry. I’ll stop ranting, now.

Arrival. Awesome flick. Go pre-order it.

And so, adieu to Captain America: The Winter Soldier.
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Captain America: The Winter Soldier is one of those flicks that definitely grew on me, although my major problem with it still stands: you just can’t drive a car through Dizzy City that quickly.  You simply cannot.  There’s almost a law against it.

And so, adieu to Dark Dungeons.

Moe Lane

PS: I actually read the hostage ship bit to my youngest today as a bedtime story. This amuses me.

Dark Dungeons is, of course, the resolutely straight-faced-or-possibly-actually-deadpan adaptation of the legendary anti D&D tract drawn and written by the late Jack Chick.  That link goes to the Amazon Prime version, which means that none of you can actually buy it there (I assume that all of my readers have Amazon Prime); but what the heck. It’s fascinating watching, especially when you try to figure out how the director got the project greenlighted*.

And so, adieu to John Carter. (more…)

John Carter was a good movie, dagnabbit. I read the Barsoom books, double dagnabbit. They were not insulted by this film! ERB would have loved every second of it.

…Sorry. It still grates.

And so, adieu to Deadpool.  Just over a decade before the kids are off to college, so I can have it in the house!

Said caveat being Keep Deadpool out of the reach of children.  And by ‘children’ I really do mean ‘under the age of 18*.’  I’m still trying to figure out how to watch it again myself.  Possibly by buying a copy for the convention and watching it in my hotel room, or something.

…Yeah, that looked stupid when I wrote it, too.

Anyway: adieu to Zootopia.

*Sure, your kid can handle it.  I’m putting up the CYA disclaimer anyway.  Don’t let kids watch this film.

BECAUSE ZOOTOPIA IS OUT NOW, THAT’S WHY.

And so, adieu to Cloverfield.

Weird that I’ve never done Cloverfield before, but if I have then I didn’t tag it properly. Go figure. Anyway: I know that the shaky-cam thing can set off adverse physiological effects on people – or they just don’t like it on general principles – but I’ve never had a problem with shaky-cam, and goodness knows a for-real giant monster movie filmed at street level can justify its use. …I’m sure that I’ve talked about this before, though. Cloverfield is, like, this movie that’s being filmed while another giant monster movie – one that’s a bit more conventional – is going on. As a conceit it’s an acquired taste, sure, but I’m now kind of ready to go watch it again.

And so, adieu to Star Wars: The Force Awakens. (more…)

Star Wars: The Force Awakens is making its way to me even as we speak, and cannot wait cannot wait cannot wait. In the meantime, check out the Honest Trailer below. Which has spoilers, for anybody who has somehow managed to get this far without either seeing the film, or finding out about the spoilers anyway.

And so, adieu to Guardians of the Galaxy.