Tag: polar bears

Tweet of the Day, AND AL GORE THE CUBSLAYER WEEPS IN FRUSTRATION edition.

This really makes you think, huh?

I kind of miss not being able to use this tag more often, by the way. It’s just not as much fun without Al Gore to kick around, though. Sorry.

Shocking revelation on polar bear numbers!

No, not that researchers have been underestimating the number of polar bears….

Researchers with the IUCN Polar Bear Specialist Group (PBSG) recently admitted to experienced zoologist and polar bear specialist Susan Crockford that the estimate given for the total number of polar bars in the Arctic was simply a qualified guess given to satisfy public demand.

…everybody kind of knew that already. No, what’s shocking is that it made Fark. Under the ‘Obvious’ tag, no less.  Not that Fark’s commenters are particularly prepared to accept said tag…

Moe Lane

So THAT’S why polar bears are grumpy.

Obvious, really:

Polar bear origins: Polar bears have Irish ancestry, suggests DNA study

No whiskey in the Arctic Circle.

Moe Lane

PS: …Hey, I’m 15/16th Boston Irish Catholic, buddy.  I’m allowed to make stereotypical jokes about drunken Irishmen. :shrug: Besides, it’s God’s own truth that the Irish do get cranky without their whiskey.  And beer.  And… well, what do you have handy, anyway?

#rsrh DEATH TO POLAR BEARS!!!!!

…suggests SE Cupp (via Hot Air Headlines) with her tongue fully in cheek; after all, it’s evolution, ain’t it? – Besides, contra certain religious groups we don’t actually know why certain species go extinct and others do not*.

The Cubslayer could not be reached for comment.

Moe Lane

*Well, except for pandas.  I’ve long taken the position that that particular species just wants to die.

‘There’s a polar bear. Coming through the *wall*. Where’s my camera?’

Not to argue with Fark, but this is not “cute.”

article-1218255-06B48EC9000005DC-983_634x440_popup

This is a half-ton apex predator attempting to burst through the porthole and eat the photographer.  Admittedly, it is doing so in a manner that others might categorize as ‘cute’ – and I respect the living hell out of the photographer in question for getting the shot, even if he or she was freaking out at the time – but geez, those things are huge.

No wonder Al Gore wants them all dead.

POLAR BEARS ARE NOT OUR FRIENDS.

(Original tip-off Don Surber)

They are not happy, big fuzzy goofballs that drink Coke with penguins and submit to being ridden by large-breasted Germanic women with eyepatches. They are a half-ton, carnivorous apex predator species that have never had burned into their very DNA the concept that human beings don’t taste good. Polar bears exist solely because we really didn’t start dealing with them on a regular basis until after we invented environmentalism; if the Arctic Circle had had easily accessible iron deposits we’d have wiped out the species thousands of years ago.

DO NOT GO SWIMMING WITH THEM.

EVER.