Patreon Microfiction: ‘Persistence Hunting.’

I liked writing ‘Persistence Hunting.’ But then, I’ve always been fond of the American Lesson: If you can see it, you can hit it; and if you can hit it, you can kill it. I forget who said that first, though: Tom Clancy, maybe? It’s still a good rule of thumb.

The House, Part 10/x.

https://moelane.com/tag/the-house/

“They dislike the area?” I asked.  Animals react differently to the supernatural than people do; or so I have been told, over and over and over again.  It would be mildly annoying to find out that possibly one should pay attention to a cat or dog’s antics, after all. But Betty shook her head a second time.

“It’s not like that,” and she said my first name. I was less happy about it in her mouth than in Wayne’s, but I am good at hiding annoyances.  Besides, she was telling me things I didn’t already know, which is something I like to see in a person. “They always seem to like it fine when they’re here.  But turn your back on a dog in the yard, or leave the door open too long for the cat, and when you turn around, they’re gone. And they never come back. Some families, try three or four times to get a pet before they just give up.” 

Betty leaned back, and made the twitch I knew to associate with an ex-smoker.  Judging from the way she was talking to me, I suspected I would be reasonably grateful for that.  “Me, this was my parents’ house. They sat me down and explained that this was just how things were, around here. Nobody could keep pets, they’d go away.”

Book of the Week: Target Rich Environment, Volume 2.

Larry Correia’s Target Rich Environment, Volume 2 is of course not out until December, but Baen has it on E-ARC. I got it largely for the Grimnoir story, but the Predator one is pretty boss, too. Or have we stopped using that slang term? Ach, well, we can bring it back for this post.

The House, Part 9/x

https://moelane.com/tag/the-house/

It is difficult to ask a neighborhood if something is out there, and eating their pets. Although I was mildly surprised to find myself on remarkably good terms with my neighbors: I am not at my best when it comes to purely social occasions, but word had apparently gone out that I was wealthy. I was also living in the house, which automatically made me some sort of eccentric recluse in everyone else’s eyes.  I might have been annoyed at that, but at least it meant that any attempts at social interaction on my part would be viewed in the most favorable light. And this is, admittedly, a refreshing change.

So there I was, then, sitting in someone’s actual kitchen, and drinking a cup of mildly inoffensive coffee while I ‘chatted’ with Betty. That is not her real name, either.  One must be polite.

Betty was old enough to be divorced, and her kitchen suggested the presence of teenagers, rather than children.  She was also a happy gossip, up until the moment that I mentioned that I was considering getting a bird of some sort.  Then Betty shook her head, in a way that I found a touch intriguing. “Animals don’t stick around here,” she said.

The House, Part 8/x

https://moelane.com/tag/the-house/

It took me a few days to realize the absence of one particular type of noise from outside: birdsong.  I have no objection to birdsong, understand. Obviously, it is merely the monotonous repetition of certain sounds, with no beauty or relevance to humanity save what we impose on it.  But I am not offended that such a thing might exist, and the noises are rarely annoying enough to hinder me from sleeping, or enjoying actual art, or doing anything else, really.  So I felt neither apprehension nor relief in the realization that no birds sang anywhere near the house.

But I did find it interesting.  And, once I paid more attention, I noticed that there were no squirrels near my house, either. No birds, no ‘woodland creatures,’ not even small lizards or frogs.  Which meant that the area should have been literally crawling with bugs, of course; but there was nary a spiderweb or a wasps’ nest to be seen. Even my neighbors did not have ‘bug zappers’ or other grisly amusements on their own properties.

And there was not a single family with a pet who lived within two blocks of the house.  Well, as far as I could tell. I was not about to start looking through windows.

The House, Part 7/x

https://moelane.com/tag/the-house/

For one thing, it took me a few days to notice that the doors to the rooms all opened out, not in.  It seems like such a little thing, but the effect was as if everything that came in from outside was steadily drawn down and into the house’s center.  Certainly little items, left unsecured, had a habit of ending up in the living and dining rooms somehow; particularly if they were pretty, or valuable.  After a while, I started leaving my keys on the dining room table (oak, ponderous, might as well have been bolted to the floor), because that’s where they always seemed to end up anyway.

Also: inside the house, I could hear outside noises normally.  But take two steps outside of it, and I couldn’t hear a single sound coming from within.  This effect even worked when the door was open; the sound of the radio (shortwave, stolid 1950s aesthetic) inside faded and disappeared most amazingly as soon as I crossed the threshold.  The results were not conclusive — there was not a clear line of sight from the door to the radio; and the radio was bolted to the wall, presumably because of the antenna — but I found them persuasive.  The house was definitely more than it appeared.

I just didn’t know why.

The House, Part 6/x

https://moelane.com/tag/the-house/

Dramatic moments aside, it was two weeks later that I moved in.  As promised, the house came fully furnished — although I made sure to arrange for my own mattress — and it was a good thing that I liked the decor, because the furniture was apparently chosen for weight.  Even the dining room chairs were cumbersome to move, and the bed itself proved virtually impossible to shift. Whoever decorated the house originally clearly was an individual of strong opinions, even if those opinions were not linked to a traditional aesthetic sense. I personally found the whole effect bracing, which was a pleasant surprise.

Continue reading The House, Part 6/x

The Far Side returns.

Officially, even. Whether the Far Side returns with new comics, on the other hand… has yet to be determined. A lot of people are assuming that, and some of them are dreading it, too. Of course, they don’t realize that what they’re dreading is exactly the same thing as what some people are furtively hoping for — to wit; having particular Views on this or that — but that’s social media for you in 2019*.

I’ll leave with this, because the Tweet is so perfectly true:

Continue reading The Far Side returns.

The House, Part 5/x

https://moelane.com/tag/the-house/

“Fall short?” I said, pausing for a moment from my veal scallopini. Which was surprisingly delicate, actually.  “Is it a house, or a competition?”

“Consider it more of a challenge,” Wayne said with a minor wave.  “Some houses have personalities. You could very well say this one has opinions.  And an expectation that those opinions get respected.”

“Opinions, but no history,” I said.  “That combination seems odd.”

Wayne smiled, almost as if I had scored a point somewhere. “Ah, so you have looked into the house?” 

I shrugged.  “Morbid curiosity.”

Continue reading The House, Part 5/x

The House, Part 4/x

https://moelane.com/tag/the-house/

After all of this, it seemed terribly anticlimactic to discover that the house was available for rent.

I discovered this while physically examining the house’s property record; most of the entries were digitized, but the town had not yet gotten to this particular property.  Included in the extremely bland information available had been a business card for a local real estate office, attached to the last sale deed (Bland LLC to Boring LLC, nothing interesting or noteworthy).  On a whim, I called the number; surprisingly, the number still worked and the company still existed. I made an appointment with the houses broker for the next day.

Continue reading The House, Part 4/x