Bob Iger clears his voice.

The retreat is gonna be epic:

After years of Marvel and Star Wars movies and shows inundating screens big and small, Disney is putting the brakes on the output of some of its biggest franchises and brands following Bob Iger’s Feb. 8 comments that the company needs to be “better at curating” franchise content that’s “extraordinarily expensive.” Added Iger: “We want the quality on the screen, but we have to look at what they cost us.”

The Mouse was already shedding jobs and expenses, so this part is hardly new. What’s rather more important is how openly Iger’s talking about the bottom line. I suspect that LIGHTYEAR looms heavily over that particular conversation; you’d think TOY STORY-derived IP would be a stone-cold money-maker (it always has been, after all), and yet that movie didn’t get the job done*. If Disney is going to be leaning on its existing IP material for the foreseeable future, best to make sure that it can bear the weight.

Moe Lane

*I will virtuously avoid speculating as to why, having not seen the movie in question — but I’m pretty sure that the days of treating the script as the dump stat in the Disney production process have abruptly come to an end.

#commissionearned

The More Promising GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY VOLUME 3 trailer.

Although as it is, there’s a strong possibility that everybody in GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY VOLUME 3 is gonna die. Then again: how long do these actors and actresses want to commit to eating nothing but steamed chicken, anyway? The MCU Diet must do a number on people.

Coming eventually: Guy Ritchie’s live-action HERCULES.

I’m having a complicated reaction to this.

Of director [Guy] Ritchie, [producer] Joe [Russo] said, “Guy is perfect for it because he has penchant for experimentation.” He went on to add that the live-action “Hercules” will also be a musical — and share the original’s unconventional approach…

It’s like Disney keeps trying to get me, specifically, to watch their live-action remakes. Like I’m a holdout, or something. They almost got me with the live-action MULAN, but the slave labor was just a bridge too far. But this – I dunno. Even when Guy doesn’t click, his stuff is still fun to watch.

The DISENCHANTED Disney+ trailer.

This one mostly because my wife pointed it out to me. DISENCHANTED does seem to be a handy primer on the dangers of wishes…

…particularly when you’ve just wished for a fairy-tale life, and you’re a stepmother. That could be very amusing to watch. Was the first movie any good, or even any good, when you grade it on a curve?

The BLACK PANTHER: WAKANDA FOREVER trailer.

BLACK PANTHER: WAKANDA FOREVER has fighting, Namor, my personal favorite character from the first movie (M’Baku) – and an almost tangible sense of sorrow for the loss of Chadwick Boseman, who was a genuinely good-hearted man and actor who was taken from us too, too soon. Everybody in that film misses him, and I don’t think they’re going to pretend otherwise. I think it was very smart that they didn’t recast the role.

Okay, Marvel’s WEREWOLF BY NIGHT looks pretty sweet.

WEREWOLF BY NIGHT looks like it’s combining the classic black-and-white horror movie aesthetic with the now-classic* 1980s gory horror movie aesthetic, and I am there for it. I have no idea how Marvel’s getting away with putting it on Disney+, but that’s what parental controls are for. …Although that’s a theoretical concept in this household. Both of my kids are devotees of creepypasta, and so far it seems not to have done either any harm. October 7th!

*I truly regret having to remind you that AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON is forty-one years old. So is WOLFEN. THE THING is forty, NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET is thirty-eight, THE LOST BOYS thirty-five**… that time period is as far away from us now as the 1940s and 1950s classic horror flicks were to me as a teenager. On the bright side: God damn, but the toys are awesome now. Not to mention the baseline medical care.

#commissionearned

**”CRYYYYYYY LITTLE SISTER… Sorry about that.

Begun, the GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY 3 Leaked Trailer War has.

Mostly fought on YouTube, and savagely enough that at the moment the only clips available of the GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY 3 trailer have been deliberately chopped and filtered. Presumably this is because Disney’s AI isn’t so much being developed as it is being desperately constrained: regular techniques for avoiding takedown notices would ablate under its impersonal, yet brutal gaze. I’m just glad that Disney can’t hack my wetware.

Yet.

Continue reading Begun, the GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY 3 Leaked Trailer War has.