Guess the White House isn’t switching to Macs, then.

Apple considers secondhand smoke to be a biohazard and a warranty-breaker.

No, really.

Dena [from Jobs’ office] did advise me that nicotine is on OSHA’s list of hazardous substances and Apple would not require an employee to repair anything deemed hazardous to their health. However, OSHA also lists calcium carbonate (found in calcium tablets), isopropyl alcohol (used to clean wounds), chlorine (used in swimming pools), hydrogen peroxide (also used to clean wounds), sucrose (a sugar), talc (as in powder), etc… as hazardous substances.

On the bright side… got an annoying hipster [expletive deleted] being an annoying hipster [expletive deleted] about the horrors of consumerism, all the while carting around a Mac, iPod, and iPhone worth collectively more than the GDP of a Third World extended family? Do you want him to go away?

Guess what: now you have an app for that.

Moe Lane


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