Jan
16
2013

QotD, I Wanted To Be A Sky Pirate, Too edition.

Well.. Sky Privateer.  It’s all right if you’re just grabbing bad people’s stuff and selling it in a prize court.  No, seriously, that’s why we allow for it in the Constitution.

Anyway, this guy was at this tech press conference in Germany, you see (for something called the Panasonic TOUGHPAD), and he’s never done a tech press conference before, and he’s horribly, horribly hung over…

A second man takes the stage. His name is Jan something, Head of something at Panasonic. His presentation uses multiple greyscale graphs to illustrate technical points. I write down anything I don’t understand. A lot of the other journalists stop writing so much. I wonder if I should do the same. This is cargo-cult reportage, a Simon Says version of journalism, copying the surface actions of those around me in an attempt to produce the same result.

Jan talks about retina displays and the way that the human eye can only perceive a certain number of pixels at a certain range and something about PPI. I think Panasonic has invented a new kind of pixel. A bendy pixel. I don’t understand. What does PPI stand for? What am I doing with my life? Why am I here in this basement in Munich at the age of 26 staring at a man fire a laser pointer at a graph? How did this happen? I wanted to be a Sky Pirate. I don’t understand any of this.

I dunno why that makes me laugh, every time – but it does.

Moe Lane

PS: The person I got it from got it from here:

3 Comments

  • Jeffstag says:

    I happens to everyone, I think. I remember working late at night is some grungy, largely deserted factory in a city I probably couldn’t name, even at the time (I traveled a lot and could lose track of where I was) pushing a torch cart over to where I was working (alone) and thinking “What the Hell happened?”. It’s not too late, do you want to go with a Zeppelin base or one of those weird helicopter aircraft carrier things?

  • BigGator5 says:

    If you become a Sky Privateer Captain, can I join your ship?

  • jbird says:

    The article is genius.

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