This is an idea of pure genius from Frank J Fleming:
…here’s a great idea that should make everyone happy: Let’s just pretend to pass gun control legislation.
What we can do is pass a law banning a bunch of made-up things that sound scary, and many gun control proponents already have great ideas along this line. For instance, I read a column in which Howard Kurtz mentioned a ban on high-magazine clips — we can certainly do without something that nonsensical. And I’ve heard the press before mention armor-piercing hollow points and plastic guns (actually, I think we already banned that made-up weapon in the ’80s). And as long as the NRA and Wayne LaPierre go apoplectic about it (“This ban on sorcerer-enchanted guns is just a slippery slope toward eliminating all witch-hexed weaponry!”), gun control proponents won’t know the difference between this and actual gun control. And this will help protect our most vulnerable people out there: politicians. Because long after the gun control advocates move on to other things, like who they want to tax next, gun owners will still be annoyed by any actual gun control legislation. One of the greatest fears politicians have is seeing an angry guy with lots of guns charging down the street, because they know he’s probably on his way to commit an act of voting.
Of course, with this idea, absolutely nothing will be done to keep criminals and madmen from obtaining guns, but that’s the effect of every other gun control law, so we’re just reaching this end in a much cheaper and less messy fashion.
Along those lines, I propose an immediate ban on orichalcum cluster rounds. There’s no reason to have those, unless you’re playing point defense against shipkiller squid.
Moe Lane (crosspost)
Via AoSHQ.
But I NEED my orichalcum cluster rounds. How else am I going to defend my home against the dreaded hoards of Risen without my rounds having +5 damage to Zhaitan’s minions. Next you’ll be saying we should ban disruptor ammo because we are at peace with all Geth.
[end NRA-esque cover rant]
You can have my banishment rounds when you pry them from my cold, dead hands. This is just a way of disarming us in preparation for the inevitable pandimensional invasion. Obviously, supporters of these measures are in league with the things from beyond the stars. If only we’d secure our dimensional borders!
Case Nightmare Green, Canthros?
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Mew
If we outlaw gravity guns and pulse rifles, only outlaws will get to say “Game over, man!” or be able to repel the Combine’s invasion.
“Nobody needs a BFG 9000 to go duck hunting”…
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Mew
“Scorpion-stare software and attachments for jesus phones must be stored separate from the jesus phone itself, in a locked case.”
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Mew
Really, there is no reason for a civilian populace to be able to purchase depleted-mordite rounds. And body armor made with a cortosis weave just puts our law enforcement officers in danger.