In fact, I would watch elephants generally. Because elephants are neat. But baby elephants batting around a soccer ball? That sounds very joyously restful. You could have yourself a fine old time enjoying their enthusiasm.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c8zelmizWho
[Insert obligatory soccer joke here. I’d make one, except that I’ve just finished watching a bunch of baby elephants playing soccer. I’m just not in the mood to be snarky.]
Elephants aren’t very good at falling down, so this variant already has a huge advantage over the standard model.
Soccer is a great sport, and should not be mocked.
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But it should be played more by baby elephants, because adorable.