The MORTAL KOMBAT LEGENDS: SCORPION’S REVENGE DVD trailer.

Points for the R rating. Admittedly, you’d think that MORTAL KOMBAT LEGENDS: SCORPION’S REVENGE couldn’t be anything but rated R; but then, you would have thought that of the live-action movies, too. I assume that the rating here will due to the sheer number of decapitations, disembowelments, and general disarticulation of flesh and bone from each other, which would be more gratuitous if it wasn’t… well, Mortal Kombat.

Let’s face it. You go see this movie, you’re gonna know what you’re signing up for going in. It’s not gonna be like the time my mom brought me and my sisters to go see Shampoo because she needed to get out of the house and thought How bad could it be? It’s got Warren Beatty and Goldie Hawn in it! …I vaguely remember suddenly being dragged out of the theater, but not much else. Wow. She was younger then than I am now. Go figure, huh?

Where was I? Oh, right, Mortal Kombat direct-to-video.