Sorry about that.
My Plan For the Whale.
— Ogiel (Moe Lane) (@Ogiel23) May 29, 2024
1). Get a large bowl. Weld loops to it. Thread the loops with the thickest chains you can find.
2). Insert the bowl under the whale, using an excavator to dig into there from one side.
3). Raise the bowl until it displaces the sand and touches the whale.
11). Oh, almost forgot: do math so that it'll be angled west. I dunno, I'm not the engineer in the family.
— Ogiel (Moe Lane) (@Ogiel23) May 29, 2024
12). Set off the explosives.
13). To quote Larry Niven: I guarantee you that sucker will move.
There. The Niven-Lane Cetacean Removal Orion Drive. Take pictures.
Just then the whale came to. A second before the Event, when it fully realized what was going on, it’s only brief thought was “Oh no, not again.”