If you see this place-mat on Thursday, please be advised: your host hates you.

Or at least the person who set the table hates you.


Serious attempts to avoid profanity after the fold.

Lots of people ask, At what point does the obligation of being a good guest end? How much of your host’s nonsense do you have to endure without protest? – Well, here you go. This is the freaking Rubicon. This is worth making a scene over. The ultimate refuge from Stupid Thanksgiving Fights is staring at your plate and focusing on all those foods you only eat once a year and your Aunt Mabel’s pie. If you can’t even be permitted to have that in peace – if there’s a stinking gun-grabber ad shoved under your blipping plate – then there’s no reason not to have the fight, right? I mean, you’re already in a gutter war: you might as well break out the rhetorical tacnukes.

God save us from Mike Bloomberg. I’m starting to look forward to that Commie sykes replacing him; fumble-schmuck moron or not, at least DeBlasio will stick to just grinding up NYC to powder and dung, and leaving the rest us alone.

6 thoughts on “If you see this place-mat on Thursday, please be advised: your host hates you.”

  1. Didn’t turn out so well for some Colorado pols this year. Another recall is in the making… not sure how that one will turn out yet, but they’ve already brought out the tacnukes in that race.

    Thankfully, my family is all conservative and enough own guns that I know I won’t see one of these.

  2. A good response is “I am sorry; was I suppose to leave my gun at home? Please pass the cranberries.”

  3. Dad has a concealed carry permit. I have one. One brother probably has one — he lives in Indiana where they’re easier to get AND has a curios and relics ffl.

    Odds are slim this nonsense will appear.

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