Background: there’s this Cannonball thing – yeah, just like the movies – and somebody took advantage of the fact that the country’s shut down to shave two hours off of the (illegal) cross-country trip. Now the illegal-cross-country-race people are debating if this record should be allowed to stand. Well, some of them are. The others have a bit more awareness:
But as John Ficarra, the creator and organizer of The 2904, pointed out, there is no sanctioning body for illegal cross-country races and time trials. He suggested that those worried about besmirching the Cannonball legacy were taking themselves too seriously.
“How do you tarnish something that’s illegal and that the general public already hates?” he asked. “If we come together as The Council of Cannonball or whatever and say, ‘No, we forbid this,’ who really gives a sh[*]t?”
No, wait, everybody’s home so nobody has to worry about seeing a swear word on the screen. No, double wait: some of you may have kids around.
This was my favorite quote, from the previous/current(?) record holder:
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“Do I think this is the best use of time while the country is staying in during a pandemic?” former record-holder Ed Bolian said in an interview with R&T. “Probably not, but for me to say it’s awful is like a cocaine dealer saying a heroin dealer is awful.”
It was a toss-up between that one and the one I used. That reporter got good quote.
Today I learned that from 1996-1998 I had a monthly parking spot at the garage that is the traditional start of the Cannonball race in NYC.
Nice!
There are some real crybabies in that article. “What if it hits an ambulance?” “It’ll always have an asterisk because of the timing. It’s irresponsible.”
Ah, you’re worried about the *timing* of the illegal race. Got it.
The record was considered virtually unbreakable until recently, when a crew turned a nondescript grey sedan into a supercar, used social media to arrange blockers and distractions along the route, and a bunch of other cool hacks (both mechanical and social).
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It’s kind of sad to see that effort fall to good luck and opportunism.
As my gaming group would often chant, “Cheat! To! Win!”
Although, it’s an illegal race to start with, and it doesn’t have a formal rules committee, so I guess it’s not really cheating, eh?
Wisdom from the groundpounders:
If you’re in a fair fight, your tactics suck.
Always cheat, always win.
Getting caught cheating is evidence that you didn’t try hard enough. We expect better.
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Also, it’s in everyone’s best interest if the 2nd Lt. accidentally misplaces his GPS. He’s going to need help doing that, but don’t shame him by making him ask.
(It’s been 23 years since I had to dig 3 mortar pits in desert breccia during one night–it would have been 4 if combat engineers hadn’t had mercy on us–and I’m still a bit pissed off about it.)