Point.
Counterpoint.
I say KAOS is ‘tentatively promising’ because it looks like Jeff Goldblum is portraying a modern-day Zeus to be just like the Classical Era Zeus: to wit, as a Grade-A jackass. There’s a reason why the Olympian pantheon was dropped like a hot potato, starting about, oh, nineteen hundred years ago. I have no objections to seeing Netflix remind us of them.
Short version: BREATHE is a post-apocalyptic movie where the world is out of oxygen, or something, but there’s a MacGuffin that can turn the air back on, only everybody left alive is apparently suffering from hypoxia and can’t think straight for ten minutes straight about, you know, starting out by getting the MacGuffin to work. But that’s not the thing that’s bugging me, really. That’s just lazy writing.
You know what’s really bothering me? You say all the oxygen’s gone, friend? Well, unless there’s been a giant scoop or something, all of that oxygen must have reacted with something. Like, say, carbon dioxide. Is that a safe assumption? You think it is?
Great. Then where are all the [expletive deleted] trees? Trees, plants, grass, moss, [expletive deleted] pond scum? They’re not breathing oxygen! Shoot, even if the trees died, bacteria are tough! They’ll be having a field day! The entire outside should be covered in green, and slimy to the touch!
:sigh: I’m getting old. This sort of thing never used to bother me.
I am worried about this: “Iconic genre filmmakers Joe Dante and Roger Corman are teaming with producer Brad Krevoy, on a new film project titled Little Shop of Halloween Horrors, which is a reboot of Corman’s classic 1960 horror comedy, Little Shop of Horrors.” The only reason I am not more alarmed is because ‘Joe Dante’ and ‘Roger Corman.’ I mean, Corman made the original. The ORIGINAL-original.
Continue reading A remake of Little Shop of Horrors?I’m not sure if I’m going to track down LAKE MICHIGAN MONSTER, but the trailer is fascinating enough, in its way. It’s deeply strange and deliberately feverish, and has the feel of a pandemic-era film (despite coming out in 2018). I’d maybe find the whole thing tedious, but this much at least made for a reasonably tasty cinematic bite.
Cage confirmed that there have been “conversations” about reprising his Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse role in live-action. Cage shared with Collider: “I can say that we have been talking. It’s no secret that I love the character.” Cage also described the character as a “mash up of sorts,” one that was inspired by Golden Age actors like Edward G. Robinson, James Cagney, and Humphrey Bogart.
It would be a series, not a movie. Oh, and it will be different. I don’t have any direct evidence for that, except that it’s going to be a Nicolas Cage production. But, really: isn’t that enough?
Not that I have anything against ‘fridging’ as character motivation for a nice, satisfying blood-soaked carnival of revenge and pain. It’s just that I’m not used to seeing whole gloops of it ooze out of the trailer, and congeal at the bottom of my monitor. It’s like grilled cheese sandwiches: there is a point beyond which there’s simply too much cheese. It feels like THE CROW has piled on too much cheese.
Happy birthday (almost!) to me. Fun times! Yes, I know, I know: it’ll be gloriously stupid. I’m counting on it.
