the-eomvjrdyrt-_s-pronounced-winchester-map-google-docs
The Eomvjrdyrt <s[ {pronounced ‘Winchester Map’}
One of the peculiarities of this item is that people who look at it somehow instinctively know that its name is spelled “Eomvjrdyrt <s[,“ but is pronounced “Winchester Map.” This is a real phenomenon: some researchers back in 1996 did a double-blind study that confirmed that the human brain instinctively knows how to instantly translate the symbols found on the Map into their own language. This would have been worth any number of academic papers, except that… well. It would have been inappropriate.
The Map kind of has this effect on people. As near as anybody can work out, there’s nothing malicious or dangerous about it at all, but the Map is absolutely unnatural all of the same. The Map seems to seamlessly and effortlessly warp reality itself in its presence, apparently for the express purpose of making anybody who is in contact with, or aware of, it remarkably nonchalant about the way the Map rewrites physical reality. People don’t even go insane from their inability to reconcile the paradox! The worst result that anybody’s ever gotten from contemplating the mystery of the Map was a mild stress headache.
As to what the Map itself is… it’s a Map To Somewhere You’re Going To Go. Not where you want to go, not where you need to go, not where the Map (theoretically) would like you to go… it’s a Map to where you’re going to end up, and if you follow the instructions on that Map then getting there seems to happen remarkably smoothly. And when you’ve gotten to Where You’re Going, the Map ends up in the hands of somebody else who is Going Somewhere Else. Just because, apparently. Oddly enough, the Map has largely stayed in the ‘possession’ of various members of various North American occult intelligence and security organizations for the last thirty years or so. Again, just because: one theory is that the Map simply likes spies and occult policemen.
One last note: it’s called the “Eomvjrdyrt <s[“ (pronounced “Winchester Map”) because that’s its name. Nobody knows if the name means anything. …Besides “Eomvjrdyrt <s[“ / “Winchester Map”, obviously.