The Nerf Aliens LMTD M41A Pulse Blaster.

…(Via Fark) I assume I have your attention, now?

The Nerf Aliens LMTD M41A Pulse Blaster: a fully-automatic, Ultra/Mega over/under shooter. Ten-round motorized Ultra magazine with digital shot counter, pump-action for the Mega. “Movie-inspired blaster sounds” included. This GameStop-exclusive baby will run you $94.99, because they have a pretty good feel for their target markets. Five bucks more might have hit a price point.

Moe Lane

PS: Oh, it is absolutely beautiful. But it’s not ’95 bucks beautiful,’ at least to me. Or at least at this particular moment in time.

Tweet of the Day, This Video Of Nerf Guns Being Used In Nursing Homes Is Outrageous! edition.

Why? Because it LACKS VISION.

If you are in a wheelchair, there is ABSOLUTELY NO REASON why you should be constrained to single-shot or even semi-auto NERF guns. What you do is, you go mount some full foam jacket on that chair and let Nana go to town. I recommend the Nerf N-Strike Elite Rhino-Fire Blaster (Amazon Exclusive); sure, it’s expensive. But, again, it’s your Nana. Don’t nickel-and-dime her fun.

The Nerf… Rebelle.

I gotta ask: is calling the line “Nerf Rebelle” really necessary to get girls to buy Nerf products?  – Which is a serious question, actually.

nerf-rebelle

I don’t have daughters, you see.  If I had had daughters I assumed that I would simply buy them Nerf guns at the appropriate point and not particularly worry about gender advertising.  Was this an incorrect assumption? – I mean, obviously the optimal result here is to have the kid properly understand the glory and majesty that is a well-designed Nerf product. If that means pink-purple and Hunger Games meets My Little Pony references… ach, I’m not the target demographic anyway.

Moe Lane

 




Meet the blessed, and accursed*, Brian Jablonski.

He is blessed and accursed* for precisely the same reason: this is the man who designs new blasters for Nerf.

Yes.  This man is the guy with That Job. This is the guy who won the employment lottery jackpot with the bonus number.  This is the guy who is not only an Alpha Geek; he is a King Geek… with a seat on the Council of Advisors to the God-Emperor Geek, should we ever get around to having one.

And he has apparently given us a 75 foot range blaster, with triple ammo capacity.

FEAR HIM.

Moe Lane

(Via Instapundit)

*Note: not actually “accursed.”

Yeah, I saw the Slate Nerf Gun-grabber article.

It’s making the rounds, after all (Ace is probably being the most viciously and entertainingly mocking about it).  Needless to say, you can have my Nerf N-Strike Vulcan EBF-25 Dart Blaster when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers.  Or when I’m done playing with it and you want a turn firing an Oh my God it’s a fully automatic Nerf machine gun I so designed well drew one of these when I was a kid this is the best thing ever I always knew that you could put batteries in or something.  Because I understand the appeal.

Obviously.