To not pity the fool would be highly illogical.

As one of my colleagues (who should get a personal site, so that I may not be able to steal stuff like this) notes, the nice thing about the Internet is that you can have a new Greatest. Thing. EVAR. every day.

A-Team, Star Trek

If there is a way to make this combination more synergistically awesome, it is not readily apparent to modern science.

Moe Lane

As promised, Scalzi goes after Star Trek’s design failures.

For a given value of ‘little.’ A taste:

V’Ger
In Star Trek: The Motion Picture, a Voyager space probe gets sucked into a black hole and survives (GAAAAH), and is discovered by denizens of a machine planet who think the logical thing to do is to take a bus-size machine with the processing power of a couple of Speak and Spells and upgrade it to a spaceship the size of small moon, wrap that in an energy field the size of a solar system, and then send it merrily on its way. This is like you assisting a brain-damaged raccoon trapped on a suburban traffic island by giving him Ecuador.

(Via Fark Geek) They get better. No discussion of modified tachyon bursts, but the Star Trek holodeck gets its nod.

I actually look forward to Scalzi’s Star Trek rant.

I wonder if it’ll hit the same ones that I would have; particularly, how every major problem in the Star Trek universe can be solved by a modified tachyon burst emitted through the main deflector grid.

Anyway, via Instapundit comes “John Scalzi’s Guide to the Most Epic FAILs in Star Wars Design.” I like this one the best, because it’s one that I didn’t think of ahead of time, but was bloody obvious once it was pointed out to me:

Lightsabers
Yes, I know, I want one too. But I tell you what: I want one with a hand guard. Otherwise every lightsaber battle would consist of sabers clashing and then their owners sliding as quickly as possible down the shaft to lop off their opponent’s fingers. You say: Lightsabers can slice through anything but another lightsaber, so what are you going to make a hand guard out of? I say: Dude, if you have the technology to make a lightsaber, you have the technology to make a light hand guard.

Well, that’s why he’s John Scalzi, and I’m not.

Moe Lane

I curse Ace of Spades for linking to the Agony Booth.

For now I am trapped within it.  Curse you, Ace of Spades HQ.  I cannot spend the next three days reading that site.

Moe Lane

PS: AoSHQ linked to the “Spock’s Brain” review: I personally would have gone with “And the Children Shall Lead.”  Either way, I can’t imagine why Agony Booth thought advertising the complete third season of Star Trek DVDs would work. The whole shebang, on the other hand…

It’s apparently Star Trek Friday …Wait! Wait! These two are worth it!

As God is my witness, they are. First off, here’s a mashup via At The Point of a Gun*…

…that demonstrates that even Holy Grail can be improved with Star Trek; and then there’s this:

startrekmovierecognitionguidesmalle

…from… well, I don’t actually know who. It got emailed to me. Go figure.

[UPDATE]: Duh, it was right there on the image. Luke Writes. You Read.

Moe Lane

*And check out this video he found, while you’re there.

What? Yes, CBS put Star Trek TOS on Youtube. High quality, too.

I’ve mentioned it before.

Anyway, it’s telling about the quality of the recent Star Trek movie that there’s been a number of people wondering how this version of the crew is going to handle meeting Khan. I’d actually prefer that they don’t – watch Space Seed again, then Wrath of Khan, and tell me how you can fairly expect somebody to live up to Ricardo Montalban – but it tells you something that the fans have relaxed about the entire prospect.

Me, I want to see how they handle Mirror, Mirror.  I have high expectations for Simon Pegg’s performance in that one.